Six Sides Of A Heart
by TRIGGER MIKE THE GREAT
Summary: Chapter 5 is UP! Doing his best to be there for his best friend, Caesar decides to get Huey on a dating game show in high hopes of him finding love that's been absent from Huey's life since his parents death. Alternate Universe...Huey/?
1. It Was All A Dream

**A/N:** Hello and good evening to everyone in the BOONDOCKS FANFICTION universe. First and foremost I must give a warning that this story is going to have a lot of famous original characters from BOONDOCKS FANFICTION, so if you aren't a fan of OCs, then please click the back button and save yourself some time. Which leads to my next sentence, mega props for the following authors for allowing me to use their gems for this story. **YoungNeil, MizzMinni3, SapphireStones **and **MizzC**. Without them, this story would cease to exist. Now this story right here is going to be amazing, if it's treated correctly. It's based on an alternate universe because in this story, Huey has never met anyone mentioned in this story besides Caesar, Cindy, Sunshine and Riley. Yup, that's right! This means that Huey and Jazmine never met before...HAHAHAHAHA! Can't wait to write about their first meeting...but let's take this baby for a test spin!

**Disclaimer:** TRIGGER MIKE THE GREAT does not own The Boondocks. Aaron McGruder and Sony do. KTHXBAI!

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**Six Sides To A Heart**

**By: TRIGGER MIKE THE GREAT**

**Chapter 1: It Was All A Dream**

The time was 1:30AM and this could only mean one thing for the residents of 257 Drayton Street. The oldest member of the household was snug and secure in a fantasy world that could never be a reality. Once he loses access to reality, he falls into a false sense of secure. In this other dimension, he has no worries of the government. No worries of ignorance and corruption. In this new discovered land, he shares it with another being and together they live in romantic harmony. This dream occurs at the same time every night and also ends at the same exact time every night. Tonight was going to be different though. He vowed that tonight he would finish the dream and find out if he truly gets a happy ending or it'll end like how most things in his life end. Dead. In the room adjacent to his, he could hear his two roommates arguing over who was the greatest rapper alive. Not wanting to have to make them shut up in his manner, he decided to simply block out their noise with his pillow. Now all outside noise was concealed as the young man smiled and felt his eyelids get heavy. Less than a minute later, he finally was out for the count which meant his escape was successful.

"Huey."

Thinking he was hearing things, he waved off the calling of his name and rolled over.

"Huey."

This time he moaned to signal for the owner of the voice to beat it.

"Huey, my one and only sweetheart." the voice sang out.

The harmony of the angelic voice tickled his earlobe and caused his eyes to slowly open. When they fully opened he quite couldn't make out the beautiful figure in front of him. Vision started to get blurry for the oldest Freeman brother as he squint his eyes to reveal the ID of this mystery woman.

"Stop Huey." the voice politely called out. "You can't see my face. No matter how hard you try to adjust your view, all you can see is my figure."

"Who are you?" Huey sat up and scooted to the foot of his queen size bed. "And how the hell did you into my room?"

"That doesn't matter." the feminine silhouette giggled.

"I must have inhaled too much second hand smoke from Riley's smoking sessions." Huey moaned.

The figure let out another childish giggle and placed her hands on your hips. Just as Huey was going to open his mouth and let out another complaint, the figure placed a hand on his lips.

"Now listen to me very closely. I'm just a figment of your imagination. My purpose right now is to show you that even though on the outside you show people that you are heartless, underneath that rough shell is a sweet, caring and gentle boy that needs love. That's the only thing that you feel that you've been missing out on ever since the death of your parents."

The figure was directly on point as Huey's eyes shifted down towards the ground. Once again the figure placed her soft hands onto Huey. This time she cupped his chin with her hands and lifted his head up.

"This is why you have this dream about me." she smiled.

"Dreams aren't real though." Huey said, feeling a blush creep across his face. "I'm not sleeping right now…"

"Exactly, that means that all the things we share in this dream you always have is real. Well I mean it can happen in reality. Somewhere on this planet, there is a female ready to share all of her love with you."

Right now Huey felt like he was tripping off of some kind of drug. He's talking to a mystery figure about finding love. What if Caesar and Riley came into his room now? Would they call the psycho ward for him?

"Ok so lemme get this straight." Huey loosen the embrace the woman had on his face and stood up to start pacing around his room. "You are telling me the reason I'm having this same dream every night is because destiny has finally decided for me to engage in a romantic situation with a being of the opposite sex?"

The figure sheepishly nodded her head.

"I'm twenty-three FREAKIN' years old!" he exploded, causing the figure to flinch. "If I haven't found a female by now then that means it was never meant to be!"

"Yo nigga!" a voice came through the wall. "SHUT THE FUCK UP! ONLY GAY ASS NIGGAS TALK IN THERE SLEEP!"

"Oh and that's why you use to always talk in your sleep until you was in sixth grade." Huey grinned at the figure that beamed right back at him.

"Oh…GO TO HELL!" Riley replied back in a weak voice.

"As I was saying…" Huey rolled his eyes and stared directly into the figure's yellow glowing eyes. "Love doesn't reside in my life. Right now all I need is my katana,my master plan to overthrow the government, a roof over my head and my brain. No heart included."

The figure shook her head in disapprove, not believing a word the revolutionary was preaching.

"Boy, I was made up by the denial inside of your heart!" she replied. "Which means you are in deep need of love and believe it or not there is at least one girl in this universe that can even meet your stubborn needs."

"Ouch." Huey replied sarcastically.

"You wanna know why your dream never ends and always stop at the same part?"

"Why is that?" Huey finally took a seat back on his bed, awaiting the answer.

"Because honey, the ending is meant for you to discover while your brain and heart are aligned with reality. Not fantasy. Don't worry Huey, you'll find a girl that will love you for you." the figure said as she slowly started to fade away. "Oh and P.S. don't go on no BS websites like Myspace, Facebook, Blackplanet or any of those dating sites…LOVE YOU MUAH!"

Huey felt his heart jolt as the familiar sound of his buzzing alarm clock played its obnoxious tune in his silent bedroom. He looked at the green LED numbers and noticed it was 6:45am. Time for him to go to class, but this also symbolized that he woke up from his dream once again.

"Wait a sec, I thought I was awake during that whole ordeal with that weird figure." he mumbled to himself. "But it ended different this time. It always ends with me and the mystery woman about to kiss…"

"Well then Big Hue, that sounds like it means it's time for you to get yourself a lady." his best friend, Michael Caesar spoke.

The fearless Brooklyn emcee grinned from his spot leaning against Huey's doorframe. However, his remark only earned a cold glare from Huey. After being friends for over thirteen years, Caesar learned to ignore the cold glares.

"Ok Mr. Brooklyn, what makes you come to that random conclusion?"

Caesar rubbed his hands together, similar to way he rubs them before he raps. The dreadhead came fully into Huey's room and sat on his computer chair.

"Well let's face it Huey. You've been a lone wolf your whole life and now you are to the point where you are about to break. Lately, you've just haven't been yourself. You just don't seem to be happy-"

"Since when do I walk around acting like I'm happy? Do you ever see joy painted on my face? When's the last time you've seen me smile? Oh that's right never! And if you have seen me smile, then you know it wasn't for a good thing."

"Huey, we've been friends for so long that I can tell by the way you are carrying yourself that you aren't happy. Yes, I've got to admit you aint the jolliest motherfucka, but then again lately you've just been quiet. When you're quiet, that's a problem. Huey, you've been always known to run your mouth, when you believe someone or something is in the wrong. The last couple of weeks you've just been silent. Soft-spoken and those are two traits a revolutionary CANNOT have."

"True, but trust me I'm good." Huey tried to smile but failed miserably. "If I've gone this many years without a female, then I'm set for life to be a loner."

Caesar shook his head and then pulled a paper out of his pocket and waved it in Huey's face. Huey's eyes quickly scanned the paper before he snatched it from Caesar and crumbled it.

"Why the hell would you even try to get me to participate in that nonsense!" Huey screamed, obviously offended by the flyer.

"Because Huey, you need some love in your life. I'm tired of seeing your ass mope around this house like the world is going to end tomorrow!" Caesar screamed back. "Maybe just maybe if you got some pussy, you wouldn't even wanna start a damn revolution!"

Huey blushed at Caesar's comment out of embarrassment. Currently Huey was the only virgin in the household of Riley, Caesar and himself. Also both boys had attractive girlfriends while Huey had nothing. Even though envy is a trait that Huey rarely shows, he had to admit deep down inside he was a tad bit jealous of his two roommate's success with members of the opposite sex.

"Sorry." Caesar quickly said as he noticed Huey's red hot face. "But I'm just sayin…you seem to be in need of some lovin'."

"Perhaps, but on a dating game show?" Huey asked, pointing at the ball of paper. "If anything why don't I just go out and find a girlfriend?"

"Becuz nigga, you might find you a dirty ho or some shit! At least on this TV show, you'll be gettin' paper and clean hoes!" Riley entered the room, holding a bottle of Vodka.

"Riley, its 7AM. Do you think alcohol consumption is necessary at this time?" Huey asked, snatching the bottle from his younger brother. "Plus you've got a lab at 10:45!"

"Nigga, that's water!" Riley screeched.

Huey took a sniff and felt his head recoil back hard as the scent of alcohol shot up his nostrils.

"This is some strong water, Riley." Huey backhanded Riley, also knocking him out in the process. "Anyways, the bottomline is if anything maybe I should just search for a female friend on school campus."

"But what if I told you that all of the participants on this show are from our college?" Caesar asked wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. "The host told me that they'll pick six girls from Woodcrest U and you get to take each out on a date and you get to pick whichever you like the best at the end? How does that sound, homie?"

"That's sounds damn right disrespectful not only to myself, but to the six other females." Huey sighed. "Not if you guys don't mind, I've got a class to get to by eight, so scram unless you want to see my-"

"We get the hint." Caesar hopped out of the chair and picked up the unconscious Riley from the carpeted floor. "I guess we can meet up tonight after all my classes are done to start talking about finding you a pretty little sexy mama!"

"Okay, that's cool." Huey grinned for the first time in ages. "Around what time?"

Huey hopped up to go his closet and his back was faced away from Caesar. The BK native noticed this and quickly grabbed the flyer to see what time the show started since he had forget. When he saw the time he tossed the paper back to where it originally was.

"Let's meet at Burger Town around eight tonight, how's that?" Caesar grinned. _'Sorry Huey, but I already told the host that we'd be there together.'_

"Sounds like a date." Huey responded, before shoving his two roommates out of his privacy zone.

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**A/N:** Since you're done here, I assume you've read the chapter. Now since you took your time to do that, why not leave a review as well? Thanks for your time as always and may the force be with all of you. BOONDOCKS FANFICTION U-P!

**TM-1**


	2. Over The Edge

**A/N:** Seven reviews for the first chapter? That's always a good sign. Hopefully we can double that with this funfilled chapter! Well to be honest, I'm not 100% pleased with this chapter but then again usually when I doubt myself, my peers tell me otherwise. As of now, this story will be nine chapters long, nothing shorter and nothing longer. Sequel is highly doubtful. Before we start this magical journey, I've got thank everyone who reviewed and once again I have to thank the author and authoresses allowing me to use their respective characters.

**Cookie- YoungNeil**

**Zuri- MzMinni3**

**Juanita- MizzC**

**Maya- Sapphire Stones**

**Disclaimer: **I DO NOT OWN THE BOONDOCKS...kthxbai.

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**Chapter 2: Over The Edge**

The planets of the Solar System must have been under some weird alignment today. A slight blush was on Huey's brown cheeks as he played with the crumbled up paper ball in his pocket. Caesar's attempt to get Huey a girlfriend seemed to take a deep toll than expected. All day, Huey kept spacing in and out thinking about the possibility of meeting a new girl and becoming closer than friends with her. Currently he and his lab partner were sitting at their station. Hopefully no one noticed the flush present in his cheeks but his question was answered instantly as he felt a tap on his shoulder.

"Huey-chan!" the voice exclaimed, disturbing a couple of students near their table. "Is that actually a tint of red present on your face?"

"First of all, I don't think you have any room to call me little." Huey said in reference to the –chan suffix being added to his name. "Second off, it's really hot in here so my cheeks are naturally flushed."

"Likely story, Freeman." Huey's lab partner grinned at him. Huey's reaction was a heavy sigh as he slowly moved his hand out of his pocket. "Yo, what's in your pocket?"

"That's none of your damn business, Hiro!" Huey shouted, now causing the two girls directly behind him to become involved.

The first girl walked up and slammed her hands onto their desk. Her long dirty blonde hair with red highlights covered her face as she growled like a pitbull. If she was trying to scare someone, she wasn't doing a good job. Well Hiro was a little scared, but Huey wasn't even intimidated. The next girl simply stood behind her friend and just gave the two boys a disappointing look.

"What's up with all this shoutin' and shit?!" the girl's rough Hispanic accent stung into Huey and Hiro's earlobes. "Me and my homegurl Lupe tryin to get some good grades!"

Huey looked at the red hot latina for a couple of seconds before reverting his attention to the other girl. Not a wise move on behalf of the elder Freeman.

"Nigga! You look at me when I'm chewin yer ass out!"

"Hey Guadalupe, I'm sorry if my little outburst disturbed you from your studies." Huey apologized, completely ignoring the girl that was _'chewing'_ him out.

"Oh it's no problemo, Huey." she beamed, tucking a strand of dark black hair back behind her ear. She then looked at Hiro, who was currently blushing. Now it was like she was staring in a mirror as she felt her cheeks get warm as well. "Hi Hiro."

"Sup Lupe?" the master of the wheels of steel asked extending a fist out for dap.

Guadalupe was just like Hiro in many ways. She was an inspiring DJ, had a very high GPA and is extremely interested in the Japanese culture. This is why these two got along so well and became great friends. Great friends seemed to be an understatement as lately the hormones began to rage throughout both of the young adults.

"Yo, I know you guys see me over here!" the dirty blonde fumed once again. "No one ignores-"

"Carmela Tiffany Rodriquez…" Huey finished the infamous quote. "If you're done now, you can sit your happy ass back down and let me and Hiro start our lab."

The angry woman, now known as Carmela just huffed and stormed back to her seat. She wasn't going to let Huey Freeman ruin her good day. Ever since that man with the purple hat came on campus the other day and handed out a flyer to be in a special event that could possibly hook her up with a hot man, nothing was going to get her down. Despite all the hate she had for Huey and his smart mouth, she had to admit he was cute. Especially when he gets mad, she likes it when they're mad…

"So what's up with Huey?" Lupe whispered into Hiro's ear. They both looked at him and noticed he was gripping his left thigh.

"It's got something to do with whatever that hell he's got in his pocket." Hiro said while nudging the Hispanic DJ on her side. She squinted her eyes and saw the small lump and nodded her head.

"Yup, he's got something in there. Maybe it's a nude picture of some porn star." Lupe laughed.

"Okay babe, there's two things wrong with what you just said." Hiro extended out two fingers. "First off, this man would never bring a picture of a naked chick to school or just have it out in public! Second off, he's too _righteous_…" Hiro then used quotation fingers to emphasize the last word he said.

"Okay, that was foolish of me." Lupe admitted. "But I wonder what he could have in his-" she stopped talking because she noticed that Hiro had disappeared from his seat. She then saw him on his knees underneath Huey's seat. Just as she was about to open her mouth, she saw him give her signal to keep her lips sealed. From the looks of the scene unfolding, he looked like Hiro was trying to pull off a ninja's specialty. The art of stealth. Huey was completely clueless to what was happening. The revolutionary's eyes were tuned into his cinematic imagination. Hiro looked up and saw the trance his lab partner was in and felt a smirk come across his face. He then reached up and slowly dug into the olive cargo pants until he felt the mystery object. Once he had it in his grasp, he then carefully removed it as beads of sweat began to form on his forehead. Just as he got the paper ball out of Huey's pocket, his hand suddenly got pinned down by Huey's left Timberland boot.

"You think you're slick, huh?" Huey applied pressure on Hiro's hand, causing him to release the paper ball. "But I'm glad you're concerned with my _weird _behavior."

"So what's the big deal with this paper ball?" Lupe showed off her beautiful smile as she playfully tossed the paper ball up.

"How in the blue hell did you get that?" Huey barked, trying to intercept the ball but failing as Lupe managed to keep it in her hands. "You don't how to respect a black man's privacy?"

Lupe just rolled her eyes and unballed the paper. Her hazel eyes nearly doubled in size as she saw what the flyer had advertised on it. She then placed the flyer directly into Hiro's face. Hiro felt his jaw drop, but he quickly recover and gave his good friend a big grin, followed up by an arm over his shoulder.

"Huey, you sly dog you!" Hiro patted Huey on the back. When he saw the twisted frown on his face, Hiro slowly eased back over to Lupe. "I mean, I just don't picture you being on this type of show. Let alone be on TV in general."

"I'm not participating! Caesar tried to get me to earlier and as you can see-"

"He got your attention!" Lupe squealed. "This is too damn kay-ute! Huey is ready for loooooooooove." she sang with hearts in her eyes.

"Hiro, you better tell your girlfriend to back off." Huey warned with a sly smile. The two looked each other and blushed.

"I think you should give it a shot." Hiro said while shrugging his shoulders. "I mean what's the worse that can happen?"

"I end up breaking one of the six girls' necks."

Hiro started to whistle after hearing Huey's comment. Whether it was a joke or not, it sent chills up and down the spines of Hiro Otomo and Guadalupe Mendez. Mission accomplished for Huey Freeman. Once he heard nothing more than the sounds of beakers, liquids, open flames and test tubes clanking together, he smirked and resumed working on his report.

**Meanwhile at the Woodcrest University Library…**

"Cindy, I don't think that this is such a good idea." a girl with wild, untamed, strawberry blonde hair whined as she sank down into the bean bag chair facing a shelve full of books. "Daddy would kill me if he found out about this!"

"Girl please!" the tall blonde with sapphire eyes grunted. "Mr. Dubois will never know a damn thing about this. C'mon Jazmine, you know want a man and here's the perfect opportunity."

Jazmine just allowed herself to sink deeper into the bean bag. Cindy was flipping through the newest ESPN magazine as she tried to convince her best friend to stick to her word.

"Just think about it though, you just might meet your Mr. Perfect." Cindy smirked. "I bet you'd enter this game if you would then get your mind off of Huey Freeman."

Uh oh, Cindy hit Jazmine's weak spot. Every single student that went to the university knew that Jazmine had feelings deep enough to swim in for Huey. Unfortunately for her, she has never had a conversation with him! Anytime they spoke to each other, it would only be a "Hi!" and "Bye!" basis. Never a true conversation and that really hurt her. However, entering this dating show would perhaps ease her mind off the impossible. Impossible meaning Huey Freeman.

"I dunno for some reason I have a feeling that I'm finally going to build a relationship with him."

"Jazmine, we've known the Freemans for thirteen years, count em' THIRTEEN YEARS!" Cindy sighed. "Let's face it, you guys are never going to be."

Jazmine's shoulder dropped as that last comment took its toll on her soul. It was a shame that she knew Riley way better than Huey, but that was only because she's been forced to be the third wheel on Cindy's dates with Riley. It was still hard to believe that the captain of the mens basketball team and the captain of the womens basketball team were a couple. An odd couple at that. Especially considering the fact that they were bitter rivals throughout their childhood.

"Well damn, crush my hopes and dreams." Jazmine wiped an invisible tear from off her cheek.

"Oh gurl, I didn't mean it in a bad way. Just look at it this way. Tonight, you'll meet a new guy and that'll give you new hope!"

Jazmine wanted to move on, but a recent playlist of dreams she has been having says otherwise. The dreams told tales of Jazmine and Huey living together in peace, harmony and most importantly love.

"Why should I have to compete with five other girls for the affection of one man?" Jazmine asked, arching one of her eyebrows up. "I just don't think the vibe behind this show is good."

"Are you camera shy?" Cindy ran up and pinched her best friend's tan cheeks. "Don't worry, the promoter told me this was going to be a pilot episode."

"Okay…" Jazmine's confused tone symbolized how she felt currently. "That still doesn't make me look any better."

"You act like its going to be a deathmatch between you and five other skeezers! Just give it a shot, if you don't like it then drop out. The event is suppose to take a full week."

"A week? Why so long?"

"No idea, yiu can ask the host once you get there in…" Cindy then pulled her sleeve up to catch a glimpse at the time. "Three hours."

'_I don't have a good feeling about this.'_ Jazmine sighed in her mind.

**Two hours later at Burger Town…**

Caesar sat in a booth all alone as he munched on his French fries. He looked at the big clock on the wall and sighed. It was 8:08PM. Huey, a man who is always prompt was running eight minutes late. Caesar sent multiple texts, tried calling and left several voicemails but all seemed to fail since his best friend was still M.I.A.

"This nigga punked out…" Caesar slammed his fist into the table, causing it to flip over and knock his fries, tray and various condiments all over the tile floor.

"Caesar, you trying to keep me here all night?" a girl decked out in her Burger Town work uniform questioned. "Because if you are then you'll be staying behind to help and no I won't let you have any part of my check!"

This girl was named Sunshine Jones and her name described her perfectly. Not only was she beautiful like the sunshine on a warm spring day, but her personality was very bright and warm like sunshine rays. She had on a hairnet to contain her beautiful natural long flowing caramel colored hair that Caesar always admired. That was always a good trait in his book. Real, rich, natural and shiny hair. If he wasn't dating Felicia, then Sunshine would definitely be his woman.

"Sorry Sunny." Caesar bowed apologetically as he began to pick up the items. "But Big Huey was suppose to meet me here and he's pulling a NO SHOW."

"Awww, that's very unlike him." Sunshine rubbed her chin and bent down to help Caesar. "Why are you guys meeting here so late, we close at nine."

"I know, but have you seen this flyer?" Caesar then unsheathed the holy flyer and handed to Sunshine.

She quickly examined the flyer and then looked up to Caesar. Caesar could tell by the look she was giving him that she didn't exactly believe him.

"Yeah, that pimp in the purple suit came on campus and handed one of these to me." she stuck her tongue out in disgust. "He wasn't really talking to me in a respectful way either."

"So I take it that you WON'T be one of the six lucky girls?"

"Nope, plus I have to work two doubles within the next week." Sunshine moaned, taking her hat off to cool herself. "Even though, I'd love to go on a date with Huey."

"Oh really?" a strong firm hand landed on Sunshine's shoulder causing her nearly jump out of her clothes.

"OHMYGODHUEYDON'TSCAREMELIKETHAT!" the brown skinned beauty shrieked, holding her heart.

Huey smirked to himself and walked over to his best friend and gave him some dap. After they greeted each other, an eerie silence came over the dining room. Sunshine felt like she was in the middle of somewhere she didn't belong so she slowly back off.

"So what's up man?" Caesar started. "How was your day?"

Huey just moaned and took a seat in the booth, Caesar followed. Sunshine who originally was going to return to her duties at the cash register decided now it was time for her last fifteen minute break. She smiled at Huey and scooted into the booth next to him. A light blush crept across his face once again. Originally Huey didn't really find Sunshine too attractive. However after overhearing what she just said about him, it kind of changed his perspective on her.

"It was…" Huey stopped talking when he saw Sunshine pull off her hairnet and allow her beautiful long hair fall down. "Nice." he managed to squeak.

Sunshine beamed at Huey's actions. Girls love getting attention and Huey was giving her 110% of it! Huey saw her staring at him and he couldn't help but stare back into her beautiful eyes. Caesar just watched in awe.

"That's good!" Sunshine clapped her hands. "So are you psyched for tonight?"

Caesar's eyes popped out as he slammed his hand onto Sunshine's big mouth. She then realized obviously the dating show was suppose to be a surprise and gave a quick wink. Caesar moved his hand and gave the girl a dangerous stare.

"What am I suppose to be excited for? I'm just here at Burger Town…" Huey then looked at Caesar. "Right?"

"No man, I've got a surprise for you." Caesar smiled. He then pulled out a blindfold and handed to Sunshine.

"Whoa whoa whoa, you can't fool me!" Huey hopped up and stood on top of the table. "Caesar, I don't want to be in that damn dating-"

Suddenly the legs of the table gave up and popped in half. This caused gravity to bring Huey down to ground level with a thunderous thud. Sunshine hopped up and checked on the condition of her friend. Of course all of his vital signs were normal, nothing deadly about falling out a three foot high table.

"Well at least I won't have to hear him complaint the whole ride there." Caesar laughed as he picked up his best friend and slung him over his shoulder. "I'll see you later, Sunshine!"

Sunshine just stood there speechless as the two boys left her job. She then noticed the mess that they just made…again.

"UGH!" she yelled with balled fists. "AT LEAST TAKE THIS TRASH WITH YOU!"

Sunshine gritted her teeth as she displayed her strength by flipping the table off the ground and straight into the glass window that lead to the parking lot. She facefaulted as she could only imagine how much of the damage she just caused was going to come out of her paycheck.

"I really guess I won't be leaving on time tonight." she sighed as she began to sweep.

**Fourty Five Minutes later…**

Huey's eyes slowly opened and he found himself inside a huge warehouse tied to a wooden chair. His mouth was covered up, so he was able to easily scream for help if necessary. For some reason though, he didn't feel threatened. A man with a purple pimp hat, matching suit and all white gators casually scrolled up to Huey with a girl around each one of his arms.

"What the hell…a pimp?"

"Correct, the name's A Pimp Named Slickback and I'll be the host of this show."

Huey looked around and found this location hard to believe as a locale for a game show.

"Ok Slickback, where the hell are we?"

"A Pimp Named Slickback only answers when a nigga says his name correctly." Slickback spat, causing the two girls on his sides to giggle. "Say the whooooooooole thing."

"Oh my goodness…" Huey sighed heavily. "A Pimp Named Slickback, where are we?"

"We are in the downtown district at my club, House of Cheeks, young money." he smiled, showing off his gold tooth. "Now your friend Caesar tells you've never tasted, touched or even seen a pussy before. Well little man, that's gonna change within the next week!"

Huey opened his mouth to object, but for some reason it all came out muted. The man dressed in all purple made a point, but not an important one. Sure sex is nice, but that shouldn't be the mold that holds a relationship down between two lovers.

"What are the rules?" Huey asked.

"Simple, everyday you go on a date with one the six lovely girls. The order of which girls you'll date will be determined by a little game they'll be playing in a minute."

Huey found this concept to be interesting. Every day of the week, he had a different girl all to himself. Six opportunities for him to find a connection of mind and heart. Maybe this show won't be such a bad idea.

"Okay, is there a reason I'm tied up?!"

"Well Caesar thought you might to bitch out and run, but I can see the fire in your eyes. You want this, you want one of these fine ass bitches!"

"Yo A Pimp Named Slickback!" Caesar came into the dimmed showroom and saw that his best friend was awake. "Whoa Huey, you alright?"

"Yeah, I guess that blow to the head back at Burger Town now made me realize that maybe this isn't such a bad idea." Huey told his friend. _'If you can't beat em'...join em'.'_

"Trust me, you'll enjoy it! Now hopefully some broadcasting network will pick this show up for me. That means Huey and these gurls gotta pull on one helluva show! Right now we've got a camera crew and they will be taping everything you do, but it's not going to be on LIVE TV."

"What a relief…" Huey attempted to wipe some unwanted sweat from his forehead, but he then remembered his hands were tied. "You guys can untie, I'm not going anywhere."

A Pimp Named Slickback pulled out a switchblade and cut the ropes and let the revolutionary free.

"Alright, I'm gonna go to the dressing room and get the bitches ready." A Pimp Named Slickback started walking towards the door. He snapped his fingers and his two ladies quickly followed behind him.

**In the Women's Dressing Room...**

"Ha, you guys are my competition?" Carmela asked with a confident laugh. "Man, this nigga is good as mine."

"That's big talk from a little punk ass Puerto Rican bitch!" a girl yelled across the dressing room, with a similar accent compared to Carmela's. "Any straight man or even gay man would love to fuck this sweet Spanish fly pussy!"

Her comment left the other four remaining girls speechless. That was her specialty after all. Deciding to break the silence, a girl that stood no taller than 5'7" got up and cleared her throat. All eyes were on her as she began to speak.

"Now I'm not one to brag but I'm pretty that guy wants a girl with beauty and brains." she flipped a hand through her long brown hair to prove her point. "Not just beauty, Carmela and Juanita."

"Oh shut the hell up, Maya." another girl sucked her teeth.

"Is your name Carmela or Juanita?" Maya asked folding her arms over her chest. "Exactly,So mind your own business, Zuri."

Throughout all the chaos and mayhem already happening in the dressing room, Jazmine and one other girl remained silent as they observed.

"Hello bitches!" A Pimp Named Slickback entered the room, without his two females. "We are about to get this show on the road, but before we can do so I'll need you gurls to change into these."

He used his pimp cane to point to clothing rack that had six suits on it. Since Jazmine was the closest to the rack, she grabbed the suit and blushed as she held it up.

"Oh those are so cute!" Juanita gushed. "I'm gonna be the sexiest bunny!"

Even though Juanita seemed to be happy with the apparel, Carmela, Maya and Zuri all gave the bunny suits a disgusting look.

"What the fuck is this about? I'm no damn Easter Bunny!" Carmela grabbed the suit and eyed it.

"It's your wrestling attire." he simply replied with a small grin. "Tonight you gurls will be participating in a six woman over the top rope battle royale. It'll determine what order you guys will get to spend your day with the mystery date."

"Whoever wins get to go on the first date?" Jazmine asked kindly.

"Yes little mixed child!" he hissed. "Lemme break it down like a beer bottle on a sassy broad's mouth! Six women start, whoever gets tossed over that top rope they are eliminated first. That will put them in 6th place, which means they get to go on the sixth date and etc etc."

"Oh." all the girls replied in unison.

"Yeah, real simple. Now I'm gonna let yall sexy asses get dressed. Match starts in five minutes, if you're not there you are automatically disqualified."

**A couple of minutes later...**

Inside the showroom, a lone spotlight came on and illuminated light over the squared circle. In the center of the wrestling ring, A Pimp Named Slickback dropped the purple pimp suit and was now dressed in black slacks and a referee shirt.

"Welcome one and welcome all to the A Pimp Named Slickback's Over The Top Rope Six Woman Battle Royale Invitational! The rules are simple; the match will start with all six girls in the ring. The only way to be eliminated is if the girl is tossed over the top rope and both feet touch the ground. Come on out ladies!"

The six girls all came down to the ring and hopped in and got into fighting stances. Maya, Carmela and Cookie seemed to have a huge advantage in this match due to their fighting experience. Meanwhile Zuri, Jazmine and Juanita looked at each and then looked the three experienced fighters.

"Alright, let's try to keep this clean as possible!" Slickback hopped out of the ring and signaled for the bell to ring.

**DING!**

Maya went straight after Jazmine. This caught the mulatto totally off guard as she felt her body being lifted off of the ground. The female hailing from the Motor City displayed her amazing strength as she bench pressed Jazmine over her head. Zuri was in the corner watching just like a viper. She then got a huge confidence boost and ran towards Maya and dropkicked her in the ribs. The attack caused Maya to drop Jazmine, over the top rope as Maya clinched her ribs in pain.

"Jazmine has been eliminated!" Slickback announced.

Zuri smirked devilishly as she already took out one opponent. Five more to go. Meanwhile Juanita was holding on for dear life as Cookie was trying to toss her over the top rope.

"Chica, I don't even know you like that! Why you got beef?" Juanita asked as she was struggling to hold on. "Go after that big mouth, Carmela! I'm supposed to be the lovable Hispanic!"

Cookie clearly made a promise to herself to come to this show to get a new man, not make friends. She then used her weight and tried to shift Juanita to fall and hit the floor. Juanita was barely able to hang on as she felt her body go upside now. She quickly wrapped her legs around Cookie's neck as she held onto the bottom rope.

"What are you trying to do?" Cookie coughed as she felt the legs trying to pull her over the rope.

Juanita just smirked as she then yanked her legs forward and yanked Cookie over the top rope and caused the caramel beauty to hit the matted floor with a quiet thud.

"Cookie has been eliminated."

"Whew! I haven't worked a sweat like this ever since that orgy back during my senior year of high school." Juanita crawled back into the ring and rested in a corner.

Maya finally got back to her feet from the cheap shot delivered to her ribs. Zuri just stood a couple of inches away from her with a sick smile on her face.

"Only a punk ass would blindside someone like that." Maya got into her kickboxing fighting stance. This caused Zuri to gulp. "What's wrong? You look a little worried…don't worry. One swift kick to that pretty face should be enough to flip your tail over that top rope."

Carmela then came up behind Maya and tossed her over the top rope with relative ease. That was the Flushing native's first altercation with anyone in the ring. Now there were three girls left. The highly experienced street fighter, Carmela. The sneaky viper, Zuri and the fowl mouthed saucy latina, Juanita. The three just stood back and stared at each other, one waiting for the other to strike.

"You know what…I think we should get that small fry over there first!" Juanita pointed at Zuri. "Then we can settle our differences, chica."

"Hold the fuck up!" Carmela stomped, causing her bunny ears to flop. "Who died and made you fuckin' leader?"

"No one died yet…but I can arrange that." Juanita got into Carmela's face. Their noses were touching as they stared and electricity flew between their eyes. The viper saw another opportunity underfold before her. She got up and ran full speed towards the two latinas. Carmela heard the footsteps and pulled Juanita out of the way. Now Zuri had no one to strike as she found herself not able to stop before she ran into the rope and flipped over the top and hit the matted floor.

"Zuri has been eliminated!"

Zuri looked up and saw both of the Hispanic divas taunted her by shaking their white cotton tails. Now that Zuri was out of their way, they got back into their instance staredown.

"Usted baja!" Carmela yelled, shoving Juanita out of her face.

Carmela then threw a right hook, which connected with the air. Juanita took advantage by taking Carmela down to the ground. Once Juanita was on top she grinned and said.

"Usted hace esto a fácil para mí, Carmela!"

"Oh yeah?" Carmela asked. "I'll show you!"

Carmela then used her legs to kick Juanita off the top of her. Once again both girls ended up standing toe to toe in the middle of the ring.

"Alright, time to end this!" Carmela then grabbed Juanita by her hair and slung her into the ropes.

Carmela followed up right behind her and attempted to clothesline her over the top ropes. When both females reached the rope, the unthinkable happened. The forearm did connect and hit Juanita in her throat. The recoil caused her to lose her footing and flip over the top rope. However once again the latina used those dangerous legs of her and grabbed Carmela's midsection and flipped her over as well. Carmela flew over the top rope and crashed painfully down onto the mat below.

"Carmela has been eliminated! Therefore your winner of the battle royale and the lucky lady who gets to go on the first date with the lucky man, Juanita Benavides!" Slickback proudly announced. "Now how about we bring out that lucky bachelor…"

Huey stood at the main doorway, only his silhouette was showing but all six girls hearts dropped since they knew only one boy in Woodcrest had that distorted afro.

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**A/N:** Business is going to pick up, I promise. That battle royale was just a teaser. There will be catfights, just sayin...PLEASE REVIEW! THANK YOU AND GOOD NIGHT!!!

**TM-1**


	3. Would You Like A Cherry On Top?

**A/N:** Today isn't March 16th, but I felt the need to update as a means of celebrating my promotion I got today! Moving away from the dreaded cash register and moving out to the WONDERFUL WORLD of ELECTRONICS at Sam's Club...woohoo! But enough about me, let's talk about this story. This chapter has some sexual content in it, but nothing too serious but you can't say I didn't warn you. Once again I must thank the four authors for allowing me to use their OCs.

**Cookie - YoungNeil**

**Maya - SapphireStones**

**Zuri - MzMinni3**

**Juanita - MizzC**

**Disclaimer:** I DO NOT OWN THE BOONDOCKS, as always. And also, the views, thoughts and actions of Juanita are not reflective of the author in any form of way. Just sayin :3

* * *

**Chapter 3: Would You Like A Cherry On Top?**

Huey stood at the doorway and he couldn't believe the six beautiful women standing before him. He knew each one of these girls and never thought he'd have the opportunity that he's being blessed with now. Now this whole dating game became a lot more interesting to him.

_'OH MY FRIGGIN' GOD, I GET TO GO ON A DATE WITH HUEY P. FREEMAN!'_ Jazmine screamed in her mind as she hugged herself. _'I'LL FINALLY GET MY FIRST KISS AND THEN I CAN HIS BABIES!'_

Jazmine then closed her eyes and began air kissing next to Maya. Letting out a grunt, Maya snapped her fingers in front of Jazmine and gave her a disgusting look.

"What are you doing you SICK FREAK?!" Maya slowly backed away from the mulatto as if she was infected. Jazmine opened her eyes and glared back at Maya. "And here I'm thinking since this is a dating game; all these chicks would be straight."

Juanita heard the insult thrown at her friend and came to the aid of Jazmine.

"Ey! Don't be tryin' to pick on my gurl just cuz you mad that Zuri's heels made good friends with yo ribs!" Juanita snickered. "Oh and also let's not forget how Carmela tossed yo ass like a bad habit…"

Maya gritted her teeth as she wanted to say something back; however she knew that Huey would probably think less of her. This caused her to keep her mouth shut, for the time being. If she ever catches Juanita off camera, she'll definitely make sure to give the freaky latina a piece of her mind and possibly her fist.

"Yo, excuse me ladies!" A Pimp Named Slickback's high pitch voice sliced in between Maya's thoughts. "Allow me to formally introduce the luckiest nigga on EARTH right now! Huey Freeman!"

The six girls clapped as Huey leaned against the doorframe, trying to act uninterested. A Pimp Named Slickback pulled his frames down and looked at Huey like he was an alien.

"I know this nigga ain't actin like he don't give a damn!" Slickback sucked his teeth. "Leave dat macho man bullshit right at the door and bring yo ass down to this ring!"

Huey let out a small sigh and slowly approached the ring. As he got closer, the room suddenly got hotter. The palms of the revolutionary became sweaty. The beating of his heart became similar to that Daft Punk song. Harder, better, faster and stronger. A lump began present in his throat. Who would have ever though that Huey's only weakest would be girls? How could he lead the free world when he becomes a nervous wreck around the opposite sex?

"Alright, now since Juanita won the battle royal, she gets to go on the first date with Huey. Then afterward we've got Carmela, Zuri, Maya, Cookie and finally Jazmine!" Slickback announced. "Now before we end this historic night, I shall explain the rules of my little game."

"There are rules?" Zuri asked.

"Yes bitch, there are rules to this game." Slickback snapped. "Just like there are rules in football, basketball, baseball, hockey, sex…oops did I say that one out loud?"

The six girls and even Huey nodded. Slickback just laughed and continued his explanation of the rules.

"Now everyday starting tomorrow Huey will be going on a date with a girl. On these designated days, only the girl Huey is going on a date on is allowed to interact with him."

"Hol up!" Carmela interrupted. "How is that possibly? What if I'm at Burger Town and Huey so happens to be there but it's his turn to be with another broad. Does that mean I get DQ?"

"Can I fuckin' finish first?" Carmela just shut her mouth and crossed her arms as Slickback once again continued. "To answer yo question, no you won't get in trouble. But if there is physical contact, then yes you will get disqualified."

"I think I get it." Cookie spoke for the first time since the match. "If I'm on a date with Huey and Zuri comes and tries to kiss him or something, she'll get DQ."

"DING DING, someone give that dame a prize! The rule is going to be heavy enforced, so don't try no sneaky shit ladies. I've got a bird's eye view on all of y'all! Now next Friday, which might I add is exactly a week from now, Huey will make his decision and then that girl will obvious win."

Jazmine didn't like the sound of these rules. This meant she would have to wait all the way til next Thursday to get a chance to be with Huey. Meanwhile Juanita was practically getting _'excited' _from knowing that she would get to spend her entire Saturday with Huey.

"Brother Huey, you've got anything to say before I dismiss you guys? The House of Cheeks is about to open up and I can't have you little runts up in here! I've got desperate and horny motherfuckas ready to see some TITTAYS!"

"May the best girl win." he simply said.

**The next day…(Saturday)**

"Are you freakin' serious? No way! NO DAMN WAY! You are lying to me!" Cindy was violently shaking Jazmine's shoulders. "No way in hell, Huey Freeman is the dude on that dating game show!"

"It is him!"

"It's a small world after all. So when's your big day, Jazzy?" Cindy cooed.

"Next Thursday." Jazmine sighed as she dug her head into her pillow. "By then, Huey would have been with every girl and not even have the slightest interesting in me."

"Says who?" Cindy yanked the pillow away, so she could she her best friend's face. "If anything, you're going to leave the best impression on him!"

"Why is that?"

"Cuz, you'll be the last girl he gets to be with. You can leave the final impression in his mind that you're the best and the rest sucked."

"But me and him are SO different!" Jazmine exclaimed. "I like meat, he's a vegetarian. I love pop, he loves old school hip hop. I like watching TV and he likes to read. I dream big and he crushes dream."

"Well chica, I guess you've never heard the term opposites attract, huh?" Juanita came into Jazmine's bedroom.

The saucy latina had on a white bathrobe with a white towel on top of her head. It was apparent she was getting ready for her big date with the lonely revolutionary.

Cindy, Jazmine and Juanita were all roommates. Even though Cindy and Juanita both tend to fight for the title of Jazmine's best friend, they all still manage to get along extremely well, except for that one time. However until next Friday, Jazmine and Juanita were friendly rivals for Huey's heart.

"But I mean it won't matter after I'm done with Huey tonight." Juanita winked. "I might have to bust out my toy box."

Cindy and Jazmine's face scrunched up as they knew exactly what kind of foreign objects Juanita kept in that chest. Unfortunately for Juanita, that trunk was collecting dust but after tonight, if things go right that chest will always stay open from now on.

"Man, get outta here wit yo nasty self!" Cindy tossed the pillow at Juanita. "And you call yo self a best friend? Here you are tryin' to taunt ya guh!"

"I'm just playin around." Juanita made a puppy face as the pillow nearly hit her. "My bestest friend knows I'm just playin, right?"

"Uh…" Jazmine's eyes shifted around nervously.

Juanita's puppy dog face turned into a vicious one in a heartbeat.

"Fine then!" she barked. "You can believe that bitch if you wanna, but lemme tell you this…"

"Wait a second; did you just call me a bitch? If I pull out a dictionary right now and look up the definition of bitch, I'm pretty sure it would say Juanita B!" Cindy shot back.

Jazmine felt herself become like Switzerland. Even though she has known Cindy for a much longer time, Juanita has done a lot for the mulatto in the small course of time they've known each other. A true friend would remain neutral, right?

"Nice comeback, Cynthia." Juanita taunted. "Well it'd be nice if you were still in middle school. But then again wit yo body and your personality, I wouldn't be surprised."

"Oh no you didn't…" Cindy stood up and walked over to Juanita. "I have the body of a world class athlete. You have the body of a hoochie mama!"

Juanita laughed at Cindy's latest insult. She then got directly into Cindy's face, so close that they could feel each others breath.

"Back the fuck up!" Cindy yelled, shoving Juanita.

That was the final straw, Jazmine had to jump in before the whole house got destroyed, like last time.

"Whoa whoa whoa, stop!" Jazmine jumped up and held Juanita back.

"Lemme at her! She touched me like a punk ass bitch!" Juanita was trying to break loose. "She can't handle the truth about her ass, so she gotta touch me!"

"No, I'm just tired of you always talking trash." Cindy answered. "You mighta beat me last time we've got into a fight, but this time I've got yo number."

"Oh my God, can you two please stop?" Jazmine pleaded.

They both suddenly got weak at the shiny emerald orbs of their best friend. It was Jazmine's ultimate move, the puppy dog eyes.

"Okay." both girls sighed in unison. "I'm sorry." they told each other.

"Well I think I'm gonna leave before I gag from all this new found sappiness." Juanita exited the room.

Once she was gone, Jazmine glared at Cindy.

"Why did you start that BS with Juanita?"

"Man, she came in YOUR room and disrespected us!" Cindy said defensively. "Whether it was a joke or not, that shit was uncalled for."

"True, but that's just how Juanita is. I'm not even worried about her honestly. I don't think Huey will find any interest in her."

**Later that day…**

Huey stood outside of The House of Cheeks. Instead of dressing up in a suit like most boys do, he had on a special type of attire. Red tiger camo pants, black Timberland boots with a black t-shirt. He studied his watch and noticed the time was 5:05. Juanita said she would meet him there at 5:00. She was already making a great impression for him. Not really…

"Hola mi amor!" a voice cooed at him from behind. Next thing Huey knew he felt a hand rubbing his crotch.

His face instantly began to burn up as he felt her soft tips traveling around his private area. Huey then snatched her face and turned around to only have his jaw fall off from total amazement.

Juanita had on a small burgundy dress that really didn't hide any of her goodies. The design on the dress made every curve on her body look perfect. Since the weather was a little nippy, she had on a mini black leather jacket that stopped right half way down her back from her waist. To complete her sexy outfit, she had on black heels that tied around her ankles. They weren't too high, so it made her look classy.

"You like, papi?" she asked seductively. Huey for the first time ever in his life was speechless. "Your lack of words makes me so-" she took a deep breath before smiling at him sweetly. "What plans do you have for us, mi amor?"

"Well uh…" Huey tugged on his collar. "A Pimp Named Slickback was telling me that you like ice cream, so thanks to his VISA credit, I was able to rent out this shop downtown."

Without notice Juanita then grabbed Huey by the head and jammed it directly into her bosom. She then proceeded to squeeze him lovingly as she could all ready taste the ice cream on her tongue. Huey could barely breathe as her 'puppies' smothered him with love.

_'If I play my cards right, ice cream won't be the only thing he'll be licking tonight.'_

"So…" Huey's muffled voice came from Juanita's chest. "Ready to go?"

"Si si si!" she hopped up and down like a happy child. "Huey, vaya mi amor!"

Finally be freed from the clutches of Juanita's breasts, Huey escorted his date to his car. Remember the etiquette his grandfather quickly taught him overnight, he opened the passenger's door for Juanita. Never had any of Juanita's previous boyfriends taken her out on a date to a place she likes. They also never opened car doors for her, let alone drove her places. Once she was securely in the car, Huey jumped into the driver's seat and brought the engine to life.

"Any music requests?" Huey asked as he shifted into **D**.

Juanita gave him a playfully smile as she crossed one bare leg over the other. She noticed that he had his iPod pulled into an auxiliary outlet.

"And how do you know that you'll have music that I like on your iPod?" she asked looking out the window.

"I've got a big library of music." he smirked. "Just ask and you shall receive."

"Okay." she clapped. "Do you have Enter Galactic (Love Connection Part I) by Kid Cudi?"

Her answer was delivered through the car stereo as the beat began and the lyrics kicked in Juanita couldn't help but bust out and started singing.

"Get ready, pop it, let's go, enter galactic you and me, enter galactic you and me!" Juanita sang off-key.  
"Get ready, pop it, let's go, enter galactic you and me, enter galactic you and me"

_Once dreamt of peace until I found you, once upon a time baby,  
I once had a dream so sweet until I had a taste of you,  
Once upon a time baby, reaching out to outer space dancing to awesome sounds, this all new to you?  
Reaching out to hold your clothes so I don't slip away, explore a new approach, a whole new free I say…_

'_Wow, that's three good things about him already! He takes me out, treats me good and listens to Cudi…I've gotta freak him tonight.'_ Juanita's dirty little mind broadcasted.

"I take it that Cudi is your favorite artist?" Huey asked to snap Juanita back to reality.

"Yeah, he makes GOOD music. I guess that's why he is on Kanye's label."

"At first, I didn't really like him because his style seemed like a gimmick. Over time though, it kinda grew on me." Huey admitted.

"Kinda like how I plan on growing to you." she purred.

Juanita then grabbed his free hand and began to gentle stroke it. She placed her head on his shoulder as he drove the remainder of the way to the ice cream parlor.

**10 minutes later…**

The two were seated in a small booth overlooking the busy downtown traffic. Huey was drinking some green tea while Juanita was totally annihilating her ice cream sundae. The date so far was good, but it could be better. Someone had to take action and that someone was the most flirtatious girl in Woodcrest.

"So why are you being so quiet, papi?" Juanita took a small scoop and extended towards Huey. "Here take a bite."

"I'd rather not." Huey turned his head away. "But to answer your question, I'm just thinking about how I ended up in this situation. Right now I'm supposed to be plotting for the revolution. Getting ready to lead the new world order, not eating some full of calories and sugar!"

"Whoa, calm down Mr. Grumpy Pants." Juanita placed her spoon into her sundae. "Sounds like you need someone to rock your world."

Huey sweat dropped as he saw her pull of her jacket to reveal the spaghetti straps on her lovely dress. She then pulled a banana out of her bowl and took a small bite. This completely caught Huey's eye as she noticed and then stuck the banana into her mouth slowly.

'_My goodness.'_ Huey gasped in his mind as he witnessed his date placed the whole banana down her throat before quickly pulling it back off. The trick she performed usually caused the person to gag, however she pulled it off flawlessly.

"Ta-da!" Juanita stood up from her seat and took a bow. "I've got many tricks that I can show, Huey."

"That's quite impressive." the eldest Freeman spoke as he cleared his throat. "I'm glad you pull it off though. Didn't want to have to clean up your vomit chunks."

"Well you know there are other things you're probably going to have to worry about cleaning once you choose me next Friday." Juanita hummed.

"Wow, do you think of anything else besides sex?"

"Hmm, that's a good question." Juanita took another spoonful of cookie dough ice cream from the right side of her sundae. Huey just placed his face into his palm. Since Juanita actually had to think of the answer to that question must have meant that she truly only cared about sex. How far could that take their relationship?

"Once you're able to have something that fits your hand like a glove, it's hard not to be addicted!" Juanita finally answered. "I guess you wouldn't know that, huh?"

When Huey didn't object, Juanita took this opportunity to begin her master plan that she had been plotting since they arrived. The ice cream parlor was completely barren, expect for the cameramen and the staff. The Dominican bombshell pulled out a small remote and pressed a button that caused the lighting to go out.

**Meanwhile at The House of Cheeks…**

A Pimp Named Slickback looked at the monitor that was showing him live feed of his creation. He had to admit that Juanita was way too freaky for Huey but it just made the whole situation much more entertaining. When the screen went completely black, this caused the pimp to hop out of his throne and smack the closest bitch to him.

"Ouch daddy!" she yelled, holding her right cheek in pain. "What was that fo'?"

"Can you tell me why the hell my screen just went black? How can I give a television show to a station when the screen goes out cuz of that kinky latina whore?!"

"This show doesn't even have a name." the woman muttered under her breath. Once again his pimp hand became strong as this time it struck the girl down.

"You would think by now a bitch would know her place." Slickback looked down at the girl and shook his head. "Control, what the fuck happened to the transmission?"

"Juanita turned the lights off in the vicinity, Daddy." another woman sitting directly behind him spoke with a British accent. "There's no way we can restore lighting, sir."

"Bullshit!" he then backhanded her. Now he had two less bitches to worry about for the moment. As a matter of fact, those were the only two people inside of the strip club besides him.

"Oh well there goes the neighborhood…" Slickback yawned. "Damn, I want me a ham and cheese sandwich!"

**Meanwhile outside of Ron's Ice Cream Dream Parlor…**

Guadalupe and Hiro just finished doing a DJ set at the Woodcrest Recreational Center. During the session, Lupe challenged Hiro to a DJ shootout. The winner gets treated to a super deluxe sundae from Ron's. Hiro was digging into his pockets to make sure he had enough money to treat his friend and himself.

"I can't believe you won still." Hiro moaned as he discovered a twenty dollar bill in his wallet. "Everything I've taught you just came back to me twice as hard and made me look like a chump."

"Boy, boo." Lupe flicked a pretend tear out of her eye. "I've just got magic fingers."

Hiro wanted those magic fingers to do something else besides flip the crossfader on her dual turntables. Lupe's bright smile encouraged for Hiro to make a move on her. The Japanese DJ placed his arm around Lupe's slender waist as he pulled her closer.

"Who said you can grab me?" Lupe giggled as she rested her head into his side. "I guess you know how to read the signs."

"Except for this one." Hiro pointed to the closed sign on the door. He placed his head towards the glass window and tried to look inside but noticed it was pitch black.

"This place isn't supposed to close until eight, it's only six thirty!" Lupe yelled. Her stomach was craving a deluxe sundae and now she was hell bent on getting it. "Break the door!"

Hiro looked at Lupe like she was psycho. When she asked him again, he grabbed her wrists and shook her gently.

"Calm down, Loop." he coaxed. "I'm sure there is an explanation to this."

From the corner of the street, a girl jogging with a white tank top and burgundy sweats whizzed past the DJ-ing duo. However, when the speedy character noticed who she pasted it caused her to jog back towards them.

"Hey Hiro!" Maya panted. "Sup Lupe?"

"I WANT ICE CREAM!" Lupe shouted as she began to ring Hiro's neck.

"Uh…why don't you go inside of the ice cream shop?" Maya scratched the back of her head. "You know, since it's right here."

"Because it's closed!" Hiro wheezed, still being choked by Guadalupe.

"But the sign says they close at eight!" Lupe pointed at the sign. Maya inspected the sign and had to admit that the sign was correct. However the one placed over the door was correct.

"Hmm…this closed signs doesn't look generic." Maya said as she examined the font present on the sign. "This looks like someone wrote this with a Sharpie."

The more Maya looked at the sign, the more familiar the font became to her. Suddenly she felt her blast of energy blast through her brain as she figured out whose handwriting that was on the closed sign.

"That is Juanita Benavides' handwriting!" Maya cried out. "I'm kickin' in the door!"

"Wait!" Hiro broke from Lupe's death clutch and hopped in Maya. "Don't do that. That's against the law…"

However Maya was already halfway through kicking and her foot slammed directly into Hiro's chest. The impact was so fierce it caused Hiro to become aerial as he crashed through the shop window and hit the tiled floor with a thud.

"Hiro!" both the girls exclaimed as they stepped through the new door Maya made.

"Are you okay?" Lupe scooped his head into her lap. Hiro gave a small smile followed by two thumbs up. When Maya saw this she decided to find the light switch and perhaps figure out a little white lie to tell the shop owner.

"I thought some of the sunlight would have been able to help me see through this darkness." Maya spoke to herself until she felt her foot step on something.

After bending down and feeling around the area her foot was near, she finally discovered the object. Scooping it up she felt around all the surfaces and came to conclusion that what she had in her hand was a clicker.

"Would you like a cherry on top, mi amor?" a voice directly in front of Maya cooed from the darkness.

That voice could only belong to one raunchy female of Hispanic decent. With a simple click of the button the remote, all the lighting was restored to the parlor and the back of two figures were visible straight ahead of Maya. The spaghetti straps that were holding up Juanita's dress were down as she stood in front of Huey. Maya could see that Huey's face was red as the devil and this awkward moment also made her face turn the same tint. Juanita then turned around, not ashamed to show off her breasts that weren't as exposed as Maya expected them to be. Whipped cream with two cherries planted in the center of each boob decorated her upper body.

"Way to cockblock, Johansen!" Juanita bellowed. "My date is ruined!"

Maya rolled her eyes and glanced over to Huey. His nose was running like a faucet from what he just witnessed. However she also noticed he mouthed the words _'thank you!' _Juanita then started yelling obscenities in her native tongue as she wiped the contents off of her chest and removed the cherries in front of everyone. Huey's nose practically shot out power streams of blood at the site. Juanita took that as a compliment as she pulled her straps back up and stepped into Maya's face.

"You're going to pay for interrupting our moment." Juanita swore as left the shop via the hole in the window. "OH. YOU. WILL. PAY."

Hiro finally got up from his spot on the ground, still clutching his chest from the superkick. Lupe was right next to him, their fingers laced together as they looked at Huey.

"Man, I didn't know you had it in you!" Hiro congratulated him. "You was about to lick those tit-tays!"

"Hiro!" Lupe slapped him in the chest, but realized she hit him in the wrong spot. Hiro winced in pain and fell to his knees. "Oh sweetie, I'm so sorry!"

"Actually I truly think I'm the one that should be apologizing. I guess I just don't know how powerful my kicks are." Maya rubbed the back of her neck as she gave the trio a cheesy grin.

"No prob!" Hiro wheezed. "Now at least can we get some ice cream pleaaaaaaaase?!"

Now with one date down, Huey has to endure five more unique dates. Tonight he thought he was going to get raped, but luckily Maya's lethal feet stomped on Juanita's plans. This process that Huey was going through definitely had its pros and cons. What will tomorrow bring him?

* * *

**A/N:** Not the greatest ending, but I promise it gets better! REVIEWS ARE MUCH APPRECIATED BROTHERS AND SISTERS! BOONDOCKS FANFICTION UP, UP AND AWAAAAAAAAY!

**~TM-1**


	4. Love Has No Speed Limit

**A/N**: OMG IT'S TUESDAY which means it's update time! Of course I've got to deliever another chapter on time like UPS, or FedEx, DHL maybe? You guys get the point. I've got to thank all the lovely and glamorous users that left reviews. Those always help keep my creative fuels running in this V8 mind of mine-

Riley: Aye nigga, why the hell I've only had like three lines in dis story? I mean I'm star...YOUNG REEZY IS A TRAP STAR! I've run these means streets of Woodcrest. Niggas hide and duck when I come through and now they gonna laugh at me becuz I only had three lines?

TM-1: Uh...this story is centered around Huey and the six girls though. I've made a bunch of stories with you as a star so don't even front.

Caesar: I only got one. I should have way more shine in this story because I'm the one that got Huey into this predicament!

TM-1: OKAY YOU TWO CRYBABIES, YOU WANT AIR TIME? You've got it! Just let me please finish my author's note?

Riley: I'll let you in under one condition...

TM-1: What?

Riley: I get to do this disclaimer for this chapter.

TM-1: Whaaaaaaaaaaaatever. Now poof! Be gone with the wind.

**A/N:** Okay sorry about that, but as I was saying the reviews help a lot. Now this chapter is probably going to be more action packed than humorous to some of you. I dunno but it was definitely a fun one to write and I hope everyone enjoys this. Now here's Riley to do the disclaimer for this chapter...

**Disclaimer present by Young Reezy:** Aight niggas and niggettes, TRIGGER MIKE doesn't not own my ass. Actually no one owns me, but the franchise 'THE BOONDOCKS' is owned by Aaron McGruder and SONY. All that nigga owns is his original characters. Cookie belongs to YoungNeil, Maya belongs to SapphireStones, Zuri belongs to MzMinni3 and Juanita is owned by MizzC!

* * *

**Chapter 4: Love Has No Speed Limit**

Jazmine was not much of a morning person. Especially when a middle aged pimp with a high pitched voice called her phone at three in the morning to meet up at The House of Cheeks, four A.M. sharp. To make matters worse, her car was currently being serviced which meant she catch a ride with Juanita. Less than five hours ago, Juanita burst into their three bedroom apartment bragging about she was going to win and take Huey's virginity as her first order of business as Huey's new girlfriend. After her little outburst, Jazmine began to become teary eyed. Now this caused the token white girl of the household to once again to take a stand for her companion. The end results of their little argument caused Cindy to spend the night over with Riley. Now the only two women in the house had a date with A Pimp Named Slickback.

"I'm SO tired!" Juanita yawned, as she grabbed her keys off the counter. Jazmine mimicked the yawn and grabbed a cup of coffee. "I can't believe this Don Juan wannabe nigga called a meeting at four freakin' A.M.!"

Jazmine didn't say a word. She just grabbed her house key and walked out to the parking lot. Juanita felt that maybe, just maybe she struck a nerve from her comments earlier. Any one that knew Juanita knows that she is one cocky son of a gun. That's one of her traits, so there was no reason for Jazmine or Cindy to be upset.

"I see you're still not much of a morning person, eh?" Juanita asked, shutting their front door behind herself. The only answer she heard was the early morning winds howling. It was a fact; Jazmine was giving her the cold shoulder. "Hey! No need to give mami a cold shoulder…I mean I am the one givin' you a ride, no?"

Jazmine shook her head and leaned against the silver sedan. Juanita just rolled her eyes and used her key remote to unlock the doors to her 2002 Honda Accord. They both got into the car and shut their doors. The Dominican dime piece then turned the key and brought her import to life. The V6 roared as she turned on her headlights. Meanwhile on the passenger's side, Jazmine was texting away on her phone. Juanita looked over and wondered who could she be texting at three in the A.M.?

"You've got a secret lover than I should know about?" Juanita hummed. Those beautiful emerald eyes that usually illuminate happiness were showcasing the total opposite. "Oh, it's like that?"

When Jazmine still just kept her mouth shut, Juanita decided to take the hint and just continue the silent drive to the downtown district of Woodcrest.

**A couple of minutes later…**

Six lovely women all stood impatiently in front of the locked doors of The House of Cheeks. Each woman had a similar look of confusion and disappointment plastered onto their faces. However two females anger stood out the most. Maya Johansen and Carmela Rodriquez. Maya was upset because she had a good feeling on why this meeting was called so late tonight. Carmela was upset because her presence at the strip club now instead of sleeping could possibly take effect on her date later with Huey.

"You know…" Zuri began while sucking her teeth. "I've got better things to do than beside standing outside of some strip club at four in the morning."

"Yeah like suckin' some dick." Juanita snicked, causing everyone except for Jazmine and Zuri to laugh.

"I know your dirty Mexican ass ain't talkin! Back at Wuncler High, you had the title of Ms. Poke-her-face." Zuri snapped, causing the other girls to gasp.

"Uh oh." Maya took a step back and grabbed Cookie. "Zuri just made a huge mistake."

"What did she do?" Cookie asked in a worried tone, awaiting Maya's answer.

"I'm not Mexican, I'm Dominican bitch!" Juanita raged as she instantly got into a fighting stance. "How dare you insult my nationality like that!"

Zuri didn't back down as she just stared at Juanita and flashed a sly grin. The other four girls just looked on and prayed that a fight didn't break out this early in the morning.

"Why thank you, Zuri and Juanita!" A Pimp Named Slickback's voice called out from the door. "What just happened between you two bitches is exactly one of the reasons I've got ya'll here!"

"Yo man, can we come inside? We are in the Red Light District, some rapist or druggie might be nearby." Carmela asked in a grumpy tone.

The front doors slowly opened and the six girls walked into the strip club. Once they were inside, A Pimp Named Slickback stood on a stage, along with at least ten men dressed in all black. A noticeable thing about their attire was the huge word 'SECURITY 'placed across their muscular chest.

"What's up with this security? If it's for us during dates, I don't need it." Cookie then did a pivot to exit.

One of the security guards hopped in front of the door and grabbed her and suspended her in mid-air. All the other girls gasped as they saw the fearless Cookie being held like she was an infant.

"I guess she isn't such a tough cookie after all." Slickback laughed. "But lemme get to the point before you fall asleep or some shit. The reason I've called this meaning is because of what happened during Juanita's date last night. ROLL THE FOOTAGE, BITCH!"

"Yes, daddy!" a soft feminine voice echoed into the room before a huge projection screen descended behind the pimp.

The footage played and showed Maya confronting Juanita during her perfect imitation of two ice cream cones.

Everyone glared at Maya as she returned the glare back.

"What the hell you guys mad at me for?" she snarled. "If anything I saved Huey from being raped by that jezebel!"

"I should have yo ass disqualified for that stunt you pulled, Johansen." Slickback retorted. "But since I like your little bad ass and I'm sure with the new found help of my friends over here, this won't happen again, right?"

"Nope, never again." she smiled innocently; little did anyone know she had her fingers behind her back crossed.

"Juanita, how could you try and seduce him?" Jazmine shouted, catching everyone off guard. Tears were present in her eyes but she fought to hold them back. "You know how I feel about him."

"Aww, look at poor Jazzy-Wazzy!" Zuri mocked. "You gonna cry? Well this is just a reality check for ya. Choose your friends wisely…"

Jazmine just scowled at the Nicki Minaj clone as she continued to taunt her. Meanwhile Juanita was being held back by security. Juanita loved Jazmine with all her heart and she was refusing to let that ho known as Zuri plant bad seeds into Jazmine's head.

"Jazmine, you're such a sweet girl." Zuri smiled, as if she was talking to a little kid. "How can you trust a girl that obviously has no respect for your wishes? She knows how you feel about Huey, hell we all do! And to go think she would try making him taste a scoop of her ice cream."

Jazmine had to admit that Zuri was making some good points. But how could she listen to a girl that has a much worse reputation than her friend? Juanita was a sex addict, not a ho. Zuri had sex with men that were in happy relationships! The list could go on for hours on all the dirty deeds she performed.

"I know you ain't about to listen to that piece of trash, Jazzy."

When Jazmine didn't say anything, this caused Juanita to get a little worried.

"C'mon Jazmine, I know you love him but-"

A Pimp Named Slickback banged on the ground using his cane. Apparently, he had heard enough of these six young women bitching.

"Save this drama for someone who gives a damn! Now please keep your mouths shut and allow a pimp to finish his statement." when he noticed all the girls just waiting for him to continue he grinned. "Alright, I've beefed up security, which will now be following you gurls only when you're on a date with Huey. This way, you are guaranteed no interruptions during your dates. Any questions?"

When no one made a peep, the pimp dismissed the meeting and all the girls went their separate ways. Jazmine was the first to leave the club and storm her way to her roommate's car.

"I can't believe her!" she cried. Juanita heard the breaking of her friend's voice and instantly felt her heart begin to crack.

"Jazmine, I-" Juanita for once in her life was speechless. How could she have done such a thing knowing how her friend felt about the boy. Sure, there is that saying that goes 'Everything is fair in love and war.' But is it worth destroying a friendship? "I'm sorry."

"Are you really? Or is the guilt trip finally taking course?" Jazmine snapped. "You came home last night and rubbed this in my face!"

"You know I've got a big ego. Plus, you know that I just like to have fun…" Juanita rubbed her sleepy eyes.

"Wow, so having fun is being topless in front of my man?" Jazmine then covered her mouth as her cheeks filled red from embarrassment.

"Your man?" Juanita arched an eyebrow. "And you say I'm cocky…look I'll admit me being topless did take it a little far. But look baby, the bottom line is at the end of this contest no matter who wins, I'm still going to be there for you."

"Sisters for life?" Jazmine sniffled.

"Til the casket drops, boo!"

Not able to help herself, Juanita ran over to Jazmine and hugged her tightly. Jazmine was shocked because usually a hug from Juanita would end with her strawberry blonde head being stuck in between Juanita's sweater puppies. This hug was different though, it was filled with love, trust and respect. Three traits that make a friendship everlasting.

**Later that morning…**

Riley yawned as he strolled into the kitchen and saw his brother sitting at the table reading a newspaper. Caesar wasn't too far off sitting at the top of the counter, munching on a bowl of Honey Comb. It seemed Riley walked in at the perfect time to hear his brother talking about what he has endured in the last two days with the six lovely women.

"So lemme get this straight, you got to see Juanita's tits? Like without cloth on top of them?" Caesar asked, dropping his spoon into his half-empty bowl. Huey just nodded his head like it wasn't a big deal. "You my nigga are the luckiest dude in ALL of Woodcrest. No bump that, the whole United States. Wait…the whole damn world!"

"I don't see why you're so excited about it. You got me into a pretty bad situation." Huey sighed, flipping a page. "You got me set up with a sex addict, a gangsta bitch, a ho-"

"But you gotta admit they are beautiful." Caesar chimed. "Can't you look past their outer image? I'm pretty sure they all have a much more beautiful inner image as well."

"Caesar, did you not hear what I just said?" Huey cut his eyes as he noticed his brother standing at the door frame with a smile on his face. "What the hell you smilin' at?"

"I'm smilin' cuz my big brother, the person I'm suppose to look up to is denying pussy!" Riley snickered. "You got six women throwing themselves at you and this is how you react? You're bitchin' about it? Man you really are gay, huh?"

"No, I just don't see women as objects for my satisfaction like you do." Huey replied coolly. "That's how you are because there is no way you can be attracted to Cindy other than her outer appearance."

Riley's humorous expressions turned into a serious one in a heartbeat. He then came into the room and stood right next to his brother. Nostrils flared up he pointed an accusing finger and gritted his teeth to make a point.

"You…take…that…back!" Riley warned. Apparently a nerve was struck by Huey's comment towards Riley's girlfriend.

Caesar just looked at his two friends with observant eyes. Last time he tried to stop a fight; it resulted with him getting a swollen jaw and a black eye. Definitely not a look to sport, especially when you are opening up an act at Club Rain.

"Why would I take back the truth?"

"Because you lyin' man. I'm really feelin' Cindy and she feelin' me so that must mean somethin'." Riley shot back. "You sound like you just hatin' cuz I found me a love and you didn't!"

Caesar cussed under his breath and just closed his eyes. Did Riley just actually diss his older brother in an honest manner? All hell was about to break loose and Caesar was smack dab right in the middle. Just as Caesar hopped off the counter, a newcomer entered the kitchen. The sapphire eyes burned a hole directly through Huey's conscience. Riley then walked over to the person and gave her a firm hug while shooting a hateful look at his older sibling.

"I hope one of these six girls destroys your front and reveals the true Huey Freeman." Cindy advised.

"And I hope you find a way out of my kitchen." Huey vented back. Caesar just silently munched on his bowl as he saw his best friend then launch his chair back and dismiss himself from the room.

'_I can see past that front, Freeman. Out of all these gurls I know my bestie will get to you. Jazmine Dubois will win a place into her his dark heart_.' Cindy thought in her mind.

"Man I can't believe he actin' like a little bitch cuz I told him off!" Riley declared.

"How much did you hear, Fearsome?" Caesar asked his long time friend.

"I heard enough!" she chirped back. "He said somethin' about Riley only wanting me because I look good."

"Yeah, I dunno what got up his ass this morning. Probably has something to do with the date he was on last night."

"Well if that's the case I don't blame him. He was with that freakazoid, Juanita and she probably anally raped him or some shit." Cindy said sticking a finger towards her tongue.

"Nah, Huey needs to chill the fuck out and not take his anger out on my ol' lady." Riley smirked, grabbing one of Cindy's buttocks.

Riley and Cindy then share a deep kiss that made Caesar sick to his stomach. Ever since he first moved to Woodcrest, Riley and Cindy fought about every little thing. They were fierce rivals and now they've become fierce lovers. It was just something that was taking a long time for the BK native to get used to.

"You got a starin' problem, Michael?" Cindy asked in a coarse tone.

"I think I just lost my breakfast."

The truth was Caesar was actually jealous at Riley's success with the Blonde Bomber. Once upon a time ago back in high school, Caesar and Cindy used to be a happy couple. Everything was going great until Caesar had to go back to Brooklyn for his freshman year of college. Not having faith in being able to hold a long distance relationship, they called it quits and moved onto separate relationships.

'_Maybe I should have been the one on this show. Felicia keeps giving me these signs that she just ain't that interested anymore.'_

**Meanwhile at Carmela's dorm…**

The self proclaimed devil princess of Flushing had at least five different outfits scattered across her full size mattress. Today she had to prove to the other five girls that she was going to win Huey's love. The only way to win a race is to get into first place. Carmela planned on doing that literally.

"So which one should I wear?" Carmela asked her best friend and roommate, Guadalupe. Lupe had her small hand shielding her eyes from seeing her friend who was only dressed in a red bra with matching panties.

"Could you at least put a shirt on?"

"Oh shut up! You act like you ain't never seen another gurl practically nude before…" Carmela ran a hand through her dirty blonde hair. "Or am I making me you horny? Oh wait, that's Hiro's job."

"I thought we were talking about outfits." Lupe blushed. "But I like that one right there."

Carmela looked at where Lupe's finger was pointed and felt her cheeks grow extremely warm. It was perfect! She snatched it up and then ran towards the bathroom to suit up. Guadalupe was glad that her friend was trying to find some real love and not the love she's been putting up with. Every thug in Flushing, Queens and Woodcrest, Illinois has at least been in a relationship with Carmela and all have failed to meet her standards.

"You've got to win this game, mejor amiga!" Lupe talked through the bathroom door. "In order to do that, you're going to have to drop that bad gurl act around him."

"I know, I just act like that around him because I didn't want him to catch on that I had some minor feelings for him."

"Well you are going on a date with him so I guess the gato is outta the bag."

"Yep and I'll make sure to be a little less aggressive than Juanita. She's a disgrace to our Spanish heritage! Just having her tits all out and shit like we in Europe or somethin'!" Carmela fumed. "It's all good though; trust me I've got this nigga in my hands."

Lupe wanted to believe Carmela, but it was going to take a lot more than an outfit to impress the stone cold future leader of the free world.

**A couple of hours later…**

Once again the time was five o' clock and Huey found himself standing in front of The House of Cheeks. Still dressed in camo but this time it was Woodland (old school ARMY colors). It was time for him to deal with another saucy latina, but this one was notorious for being aggressive and always getting what she wants.

"I don't believe in religion but God please help me on this date." he looked up to clouds. Suddenly his prayers were interrupted by loud bass shaking the foundation below him. On cue he looked back to ground level and saw a pearl white Escalade pulling up beside him. The windows were tinted so the idenifty of the driver was a mystery until they casually rolled down the passenger's window.

"Sup Freeman." Carmela greeted with a small smile. Even though she had on designer sunglasses, Huey could see the twinkle present in her eyes.

"Hello." he simply responded back.

"I know it's usually the traditional for the man to take the girl out but today is a new day. So how about you hop in and let Mela take you for a ride."

"Uh…I guess." Huey just shrugged his shoulders and hopped into the luxury SUV.

The first thing that caught Huey's eye was Carmela's outfit. She had on a denim catsuit that hugged her Mrs. Buttersworth shaped body perfectly. Of course, she only zipped up enough to wear her cleavage could show. Normally she wore her hair down, but currently it was tied into a wavy ponytail.

"You look nice." Huey admitted, a small tint of red covering his cheeks.

"Thanks, you ain't lookin' too bad yourself." she grinned back.

Once his seatbelt was fastened, the dirty blonde latina drove off towards their destination. As Carmela changed lanes, she glanced at Huey who looked completely ticked off already. This made her worry and also took her train of thought off of the road.

"CARMELA! PAY ATTENTION!"

She was snapped out of her worried trance as she swerved out of the danger of rear ending another car. Once she gained control, she saw Huey giving her a concerned look.

"Are you alright? We could have got hurt you know."

"I'm sorry, you just look upset." Carmela then grabbed his hand. "Is something wrong?"

Huey felt his eyes double their sizes. Is this the same girl that allegedly killed tons of gang members back in Queens? Was this the girl who brings a loaded Desert Eagle to their college on a daily basis? Was this the girl who just snapped on him Friday during their Biology lab? Nope, this was a different girl. A girl that Huey could actually find himself getting use to.

"Actually, me and Riley got into a little tiff earlier and he kinda said something that hit home."

"What did that little punk tell you?"

Huey then just turned his head away and looked out the window. Carmela decided it would be best to drop the subject while she had him calm.

"So according to the interest sheet you gave to Slickback…" Huey broke out of his silence as he examined the sheet. "You like karaoke and go-kart racing?"

"I love em, those are my favorite civil things to do."

"Well Club Rain has a karaoke bar…"

"Nah, I want to race Huey." she grinned. "I want to get that victory lap that will lead me to your heart."

Huey coughed as she mentioned his heart. Carmela frowned at his action, but shook it off as she noticed they arrived to their destination. The elder Freeman watched the vehicle come to a complete stop before he scanned the area. This area didn't look like the go-kart stadium near the outskirts of town.

"Where are we?" Huey asked. All of a sudden the sounds of V6 and V8 engines surrounded the couple. "And what the hell is up with all these cars?"

All of the cars present were Tuners and Exotics. A man dressed in all black approached Carmela with a pair of car keys.

"You got mah money?" the man asked in a rough Italian voice.

"Here you go, Giovanni." she handed him a thick stack of money. Huey was shocked at the amount of money his date just surrendered. She surely wasn't joking about treating him. "Now what's the prize money for first place?"

"Well after we add yer money to the jackpot, the total will be five grand."

"Oh that's perfect! You got my Nissan Skyline tuned up?"

"She's right over there." he pointed to the rare import. "Who is this wise guy?"

"Oh, him?" she wrapped her arms around Huey's neck. "This is my future boyfriend, Huey. Huey, this is a business partner of mine, his name is Giovanni."

"You're a lucky guy to have a woman like Carmela, my boy." Giovanni extended his hand out to Huey.

"I guess so." Huey barely shook the man's hand. His attention then shifted over to Carmela. "This isn't a go-kart. As a matter of fact Nissan Skylines are illegal here in the U.S.!"

"Oh boy, when are you gonna stop being a goody goody two shoes and just live your life to the fullest? Sure we are about to break some laws, but you're a rebel!" Carmela cooed dragging him to the car.

Huey did not like the one hundred and eighty degree turn this date just took. Instead of racing in some go-karts that probably would only reach the max speed of thirty miles per hour, he was now about to get into a car that could reach the max of two hundred and thirty five. Good thing Huey said his prayers earlier.

Carmela and Huey hopped into the 2000 red Nissan Skyline GT-R and strapped themselves down. Once they were safe inside the car, they pulled up to the starting line. According to the GPS, the race was starting at Woodcrest Hills, going through the downtown districts and ending at Wuncler Housing Projects. All together this race was twenty six miles long. The other five racers pulled up beside Carmela and measured up with the starting line. Their opponents was a 1988 yellow Toyota Corolla, 1996 pink Mitsubishi 3000GT, 2006 silver Infiniti G36 coupe, 2004 pearl white Volkswagen Golf GTI and a 2002 cobalt blue Acura Integra. A woman then came up in between Carmela's Skyline and the pink Mitsubishi 3000GT holding a checked flag.

"Ready?" her answered was delivered by the revving of six engines. "GO!"

All of the cars peeled off and shot down the straightaway leaving the flag in the dust. Leading the pack was the blue Integra. In close second was the silver G36 and holding down third was no other than Carmela and Huey. Huey was surprised that Carmela was using manual transmission versus the automatic he saw present in her Escalade. The car jerked violently as she shifted into third gear and reached speed over one hundred miles per hour. Coming up on their rear was the pearl white Golf GTI, so Carmela eased the car over to block access.

"Hey Mela!" the driver of the Volkswagen yelled, swerving over to her right. "Get outta my way so I can take that third place!"

"In your dreams, Roman!" Carmela rolled her eyes and shifted into the next gear.

The results in the gear switch gave her extra momentum to create now create a good gap in between her and Roman. Now she was seemingly closing in on second place. Now this is the part of the race that started to become complicated. Huey cussed silently as he saw them pass a sign that read 'Woodcrest City Limits'.

"Make a turn fifty yards right on Glover Boulevard." the GPS said in its computed tone.

Carmela then squinted her eyes and used the handbrake to begin making her turn onto the street. During this long drift, a huge wave of incoming and oncoming traffic crowded the streets. Huey just started screaming as Carmela remained calm and smoothly made the transition barely making it in between a semi and a moving van.

"CARMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELA!" Huey shouted, holding on to his seat tightly. "WE ARE GOING TO DIE!"

She just looked at him and smirked. A confident smirk was present they finally made it onto Glover Blvd without even a scratch on them or the car. Carmela felt she deserved a reward. She reached for the upper breast pocket of her denim catsuit and pulled out a pack of Newport 100s.

"I hope you don't mind, chico." as she lit the cigarette stick and took a huge puff.

Huey just downed his window and allowed the second hand smoke to freely sail out of the car. Meanwhile Carmela was finally inches away from reaching the owner of the silver G36 coupe. Once again another turn was coming up, but this time both sides of the roads were jammed.

"Bullshit!" Carmela slammed her fists onto the steering wheel.

With the speed she was going at, there was no way she could stop in time without crashing into another vehicle. Meanwhile ahead of them the G36 was facing the same problem as he tried to slam on his emergency brakes. The end result of that action was horrific. His front tires blew out and made his car to begin to tumble around and become airborne in crashed into a building with a huge explosion. Huey gulped as he knew that they were about to reach the same fate.

"Freeman, have confidence if yer gurl, por favor!" Carmela exclaimed.

"I'm sure the guy in front of us had the same motives and look at him now." Huey pointed to the driver of the G36 who was currently running around engulfed in flames.

Carmela sweatdropped. She had to admit there was no way her brakes would be able to stop them in time. She could go onto the sidewalk, but too many pedestrians were present at the time. Then there was one more option…

"Hang on, Huey." she hollered.

Carmela then veered right and lined herself up with a tow truck that had a ramp attachment. Huey saw this and instantly began sweating bullets. If she was as much as a cemimeter off on her measures, they could hit the truck and flip over. Feeling she had the perfect alignment, the devil princess of Flushing let out a high pitch battle cry and pressed a button labeled 'NOS' on her steering wheel. It was like the equivalent of getting a mushroom in MarioKart, the Skyline a huge acceleration boost as the wheels rolled onto the ramp perfectly. The Skyline reached the peak of the ramp and then soared through the busy intersection.

"HOLY SHIT!" Huey yelled, looking out the window to see all of the cars below them.

The wheels finally reached the street again as the frame of the car crashed onto the pavement, causing some sparks to fly. Carmela looked at Huey with a confident smile. Huey's face at this moment was priceless. He was petrified. Only if Carmela had a camera, she should share this rare site with the world. However right now, she had to focus on winning this race and earning five grand and a place in Huey's heart.

"We've reached the halfway point of the race." Carmela said while scanning the GPS. "The leader of the pack is currently less than quarter of a mile in front of us!"

They both looked up and saw the blue Integra dodging through the city traffic with relative ease. Carmela was doing the same as she began approaching the tale of the two door import from Japan. Once she had an opening, she pulled beside the Integra and downed her window.

"Thanks for the first place, chump!" Carmela teased, as her finger rested on the 'NOS' button.

The Integra then responded by ramming into her and causing the Skyline to temporary lose control. Carmela fought to keep the steering wheel steady as the Interga then came over again and rammed them.

"What the fuck, pendejo!" Carmela cussed. "What's yo deal?"

The passenger's window slowly rolled down and revealed a figure that Carmela hadn't seen since her senior year of high school. His cold eyes pierced directly through her. Sweat beads began to drop from Carmela's forehead as her throat went dry. This guy was known as Juan, former leader of the Bloods in Flushing.

"I thought you were in Puerto Rico!" she croaked. The driver of the Interga laughed as he pulled out a Mini-Uzi.

"No my sweet Carmela, I've been here for at least three months." he grinned aiming at Carmela's forehead. "I've come back for my revenge against that bitch you call a sister."

Huey felt like a deer caught in the headlights. His body couldn't move because of the fear that maniac beside them was about to fill their car up with lead. Carmela was trying to still gain control of the car and reach under her driver's seat at the same time.

"Who is that monkey in the car with you?" the first place driver asked with a laugh. "Is he supposed to be your knight and shining armor? I'll smoke him just like I did most of your other boyfriends!"

"LEAVE MI HERMANA de BEBE ALONE!" another car approached the two screaming over the rapid fire of the P90 submachine gun she was firing.

Carmela felt a smile grow across her face because she knew exactly who that voice belonged to. Her older sister, Marisol. A lot of people commonly thought that Carmela and Marisol were twins because they practically looked the same except Marisol's hair was blonde. But the reality is that Marisol is two years older than Carmela.

"Ah shit!" Juan yelled swerving back over creating a gap between himself and Carmela. "How the hell did you even know where we were?"

"I don't know how my sister forgot how you drive a blue Integra…but I saw you right at the busy intersection of Gumtree and Blazewell." Marisol grinned as she fired some more rounds at the blue car.

"You two bitches just don't know when to quit, huh?" Juan sighed. "I guess I have to use my secret weapon."

"Secret weapon?" Huey asked, curious to what this maniac had in store for them.

Suddenly the trunk of Juan's Integra flew off and an auto-sentry gun slowly rose up from the trunk. This gun was armed with a turret that fires at enemies detected by heat. It instantly lived up to its name as the gun began to fire at Marisol.

"MARI!" Carmela cried as she saw the car getting butchered by the FMJ (full metal jacket) bullets.

Having no choice, Marisol bailed out of her car as the remaining bullets caused the car to explode upon impact.

"Don't worry about me…AH!" Marisol yelled holding her extremely bruised leg. "Just…win…the…race."

Huey just looked on in shock. He was simply amazed at the technology the gangbanger had at his disposal. However as long as that sentry gun was online, the Skyline was going to become kin to Swiss cheese if they didn't do something.

"We need to turn back for my sister." Carmela said with tears in her eyes.

"We can't." Huey replied sadly. "If we turn around now, that sentry gun is going to tear us up! Now listen to me and listen closely. I want you to get as close you can Juan without getting directly behind him. I just need you to line-up like how we were earlier."

"Did you forget that motherfucka has a Mini-Uzi as well?"

"I know you've got a weapon under driver's seat." Huey pointed. "Pull it out and defend us…"

Carmela nodded her head and swerve as far away from the rear end of the Integra as possible. Once she got lined up with him from the right side, Huey unbuckled his seatbelt and slowly climbed to the roof of the Skyline. Juan was completely obvious to what Huey was trying to do and focused on Carmela as he saw her downing her window.

"Eat lead, sucka!" she then fired a burst from her pink G18 machine pistol.

Apparently some of the bullets connected because Juan grabbed his arm and yelped in pain. However, he was still able to control his arm as he kept control of his car. Meanwhile above the two gun toting Hispanics, Huey was on the roof of the Interga. Now Huey had two choices, either he could just disable the sentry gun like he planned or he could take out Juan. He was snapped out of his thoughts as he heard sirens coming from in front of him and behind him.

"Shit." he cussed.

He then slid down the rear view window of the Integra and pulled out his tactical knife. With a quick swing, he disabled the sentry gun by cutting the wires connected to the turret. Now Huey had to find a way to get back onto Carmela's car, with the cops getting ready to surround them. It was too late though, SWAT trucks, FBI cars and police cruisers had the road blocked up ahead. He then looked behind him and saw a flock of cop cars approaching them.

"Shit." he cussed once again as he felt the Integra come to a complete stop.

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**A/N:** Sorry I had to end it on that note, but you know what you have to do now right? REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW! BOONDOCKS FANFICTION UP, UP AND UP SOME MORE!

**~TM-1**


	5. Guess Hoe's Going To The Carnival?

**A/N: Guess who's back? Back again? TRIGGER MIKE'S BACK SUCKAS! I couldn't let this die. I just couldn't. This has been one of the most creative I've ever written. The reviews are what keep me and this story alive. So shoutouts to everyone that has reviewed/read/favorited this story. I love you guys. So let's end 2011 with a BANG. Here is Chapter 5 rolling on 24s...Also sorry for the lack of proofreading but I wanted to get this up before 2012, so I'll go back and proofread it later if it's terrible. (Which I doubt)**

**Disclaimer: Still after all these years, I do NOT own The Boondocks. Nuff said.**

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**Chapter 5: Guess Hoe's Going To The Carnival**

The dining room of Burger Town sparkled brightly as Sunshine reached the last booth. She wiped down the table and smiled at her beautiful reflection. Sunday nights were always slow like this, so Sunshine always started cleaning an hour earlier. Now with a sparkly clean dining room, all Sunshine would have to worry about is counting down her register at nine. Looking at her wrist, a look of amusement was present of her face. The time was eight thirty. The only problem was what could she possibly do for thirty minutes to pass the time?

"What can I do now?" Sunshine scratched the top of her head.

She then walked back over to her cash register and just rested her elbows onto the marble countertop. Underneath her register, she had a magazine, some M&M's and a juice box. If you didn't know any better you would think she was in high school still. The cover of the magazine had her idol on the front cover. Pharrell Williams without a shirt on would always cause Sunshine to melt. Her eyes were glued to the text inside of the magazine until she heard the door open. No one ever comes to Burger Town this late!

'_Man, whoever this is better be eating to go.' _Sunshine prayed in her mind.

The brown skinned young girl then looked up and saw a familiar face.

The customer walked up to the counter and gave Sunshine a small smile before she started studying the menu. Once the customer figured out what she wanted Sunshine stuck her magazine back in its safe and secure spot and got her terminal ready to receive the order.

"Welcome to Burger Town! How may I help you?" Sunshine put on her biggest smile.

"Yeah um, lemme get the Townhouse Deluxe Burger, a small iced tea and small fries."

This customer was Cookie Johnson. Better known as The Lone Wolf of Woodcrest. Her place of birth is unknown, but before she came to Woodcrest she lived in Washington, D.C. with her younger brother, Dee Johnson. She was raising him on her own but things got kind of hectic, so she decided that they needed to start a new life in a new location.

"Okay, is that for here or to go?" Sunshine asked. _'Please say to go! Please say to go! I DON'T WANNA CLEAN UP A-GAIN!'_

Cookie placed a finger to her chin as she thought of where she would like to dine. To go would mean she'd have to wait until she got home and she lived a good twenty minutes away from Burger Town. If she ate at Burger Town though, she could enjoy the cow flesh now and get some intel about a certain somebody.

"That's for here." Cookie confirmed.

Sunshine's dream of leaving work on time shattered before her eyes. It's a good thing Cookie can't read minds but if she could right now then Sunshine would probably be a dead girl walking. Another reason why Sunshine wasn't too happy about this decision is because of the rumors she has heard about Cookie. Allegedly back in D.C., Cookie has held down her own thanks to an exclusive library of weapons.

'_What if they burn her burger? Then she's shoot me until I look like swiss cheese!'_

"So what's my total?" Cookie cleared her throat. Sunshine snapped out of her trance and looked at the total on her screen.

"Six dollars and thirty-three cents." Sunshine answered with a big ol' grin. She then reached under the counter and handed Cookie a cup for her drink. "It should be ready very soon. I'll bring it to you."

"Alright, thanks." Cookie then turned to head towards the drink station.

Meanwhile Sunshine walked to the back of the kitchen and proceeded to head towards the manager's office. Once she reached the closed door, she pounded on it. No response. Another couple of hard bangs only resulted in the same manner. No response. Sunshine felt her nostrils flared as she banged once again but this time, she felt the door become weak as her hand went straight through it.

'_Oh no!'_

"Sunshine Jones!" the manager poked her head through the new hole in her door. "What is the meaning of this?"

Sunshine gulped as her eyes darted around to show that she was nervous. After taking a deep breath, she allowed everything to escape out in one extremely long run-on sentence.

"THERE'!"

"Whoa, what?"

"Cookie Johnson is out in the dining room." Sunshine panted. "The Lone Wolf of Woodcrest. The girl that allegedly killed a man with her bare hands!"

"Cookie is my neighborhood and she's got to be one of the most polite people I know in this town. Way better than those Chicago natives, yuck!" Sunshine's manager gave her employee a disappointing look. "Now you go out there and give Cookie the best service ever! Because if you don't not only will I demote you from Senior Cashier, but I will also make you pay DOUBLE for this hole in my door."

"Ma'am! Yes ma'am!" Sunshine saluted and then ran back out to the kitchen.

"Alright Sunny, here's the order!" one of the cooks yelled, handing the burger and fries over.

Just as suspected, Cookie was sitting in a booth all the way in the back of the store. She looked so lonely. Sunshine was still afraid of what this woman was capable of. Even though Cookie hasn't proposed any threats, those rumors are just too intimidating.

"Hey Sunshine!" Cookie looked up as she smelled the food approaching her. "Can I have a word with you?"

"Uh…sure." Sunshine gulped.

Cookie noticed the nervous look on Sunshine's face. That look is something that Cookie has become so familiar with. Everyone thinks she's a bad person just because she had to hold down her own back in D.C. Sometimes the things she did were unholy she had to admit, but overall it was the only way for her survive.

"You don't have to be scare of me." Cookie gave Sunshine a hearty smile. "Now if you don't mind, I need to get some intel on Huey Freeman."

"Why from me though?"

"Because Sunshine, I know you like him."

Sunshine's face became the color of a red hot tamale. She shook her head really fast as she tried to cover her face from embarrassment.

"T-t-that's not true." the senior cashier croaked. "I just know the Freemans really well."

"Okay." Cookie simply said. "Well you can still help me figure him out. I've got a date with him on Wednesday and I need to get as much tips as possible."

"You're on that show too? I knew that Jazmine and Maya ended up on there, but you?"

"Is that some sort of problem?" Cookie asked through gritted teeth.

"OH NO! OH NO NO NO!" she exclaimed quickly. "I'm just surprised that's all. You know I was offered a spot too but I declined."

The two girls then began to have a deep conversation about Huey and the other five girls as well. Cookie was actually taking notes as Sunshine explained the pros and cons of Huey Freeman. All this knowledge that Cookie was receiving gave her a new born confidence in taking Huey as her new boyfriend by Friday!

**The next day…(Monday)**

Huey slowly woke up into a different atmosphere than the place he knows as home. As his vision became clear, the walls did look a tad bit familiar. The strong essence of alcohol was present. A closer funk was near Huey at the moment as he slowly rolled over into a stray thong. Once he realized what was on his face, he tossed it and shot up from the heart shaped bed. To his right, the person responsible for him not being in jail right now was laughing his ass off.

"Oh man!" A Pimp Named Slickback slapped his knee, still laughing. "You shoulda saw yo face when you faceplanted dem draws!"

"That's not funny." Huey crossed his arms and stared at A Pimp Named Slickback. "Last thing I remember is being in the backseat of one of those police cruisers. How did I end up back here at The House Of Cheeks?"

A Pimp Named Slickback just let out a sigh and twirled his pimp cane like a baton before slamming it back into the ground.

"Nigga, I hired some white boys to save your ass from gettin' anally raped in jail and you can't even say thank you? You are more concerned about your whereabouts?" Slickback sucked his teeth. "This is why I don't deal with niggas, just strictly bitches!"

Huey just turned his eyes into another direction and saw the two men responsible for his well being at the strip club instead of the jailhouse. Both men looked to be under the influence of alcohol or/and weed. The first man to acknowledge the revolutionary had blonde cornrows.

"HU-EY!" he snickered. "What's up, fam?"

"Nothing really. You know just living the ordinary life. Getting into an illegal street race, being arrested and then saved by two maniacs. The good life." Huey just shook his head.

"Yo Rummy, it seems like Huey's bein sippin on that industrial bottle of HATERADE." Ed hiccupped, wrapping his free arm around Huey. His other arm was holding a 40 ounce of course.

"But yo tonight he gets to be with dat one chick."

"Dat one chick…" Rummy spaced out. "Oh yeah! That gurl that's been with nearly every man in the tri-state area!"

"Zuri Denvers." everyone said in complete unison.

"Yup, that's a top-notch ho right thurr." Slickback adjusted his frames. "You are quite the lucky man, Huey."

"Being with a girl like Zuri makes me lucky? Are we talking about the same girl?" Huey wiped his face with his hand.

"Zuri Denvers is probably the most experienced girl around your age here in Woodcrest. She knows every tip and trick to tickle your pickle." Slickback took a seat in his throne. "She's an honorable mention to be one of my hoes."

"Now look here, Slickback!" Huey stomped the ground, not caring he didn't say the pimp's whole name. "I've dealt with a sex addict and a speed junkie, but as a strong independent black man I refuse to attend a date with a disgraceful girl like Zuri."

"Maaaaaan, you complain more than my bitches!"

"C'mon Huey, just give Zuri a chance." Ed took a swig from his half-empty bottle. "I gave her one and I received a happy ending."

"You ain't supposed to talk about that Ed! That was before she was eighteen you dumb shit…" Rummy whispered to his wingman. Huey's ears wiggled as he heard the disturbing information being past from Gin Rummy to Ed Wuncler III.

"You signed papers to confirm that you wouldn't decline any of the dates for my show. My show, that still needs a name…" Slickback scratched his goatee.

"Wait a second. When in the world did I ever sign papers? My so-called best friend just threw my ass into the frying pan with this dumb ass show."

Slickback then pulled out a long paper that stretched out to be at least six feet. At the very end of the long contact, a forged signature that read Huey Freeman was present. The font of course belonged no other than Michael Caesar.

"Does that chicken scratch look like my handwriting?"

"Does it look like I know how your damn handwritin' looks, dumbass? But your name is on here regardless and if you back out then I can sue your ass til you become poor times two!" Slickback mocked back. "Now how about you take that nappy ass head of yours home and get ready for your date with Zuri."

Ed and Rummy then grabbed Huey and tossed him through the main doors. The way Huey soared through the air; you would have thought he was DJ Jazzy Jeff's stunt double. A cloud of dust emerged from the pavement as Huey allowed gravity to bring him back down.

"Man, I can't wait til Friday." Huey spoke outloud. "At this rate, I'll probably call this one a no contest."

**Later that day…**

Caesar looked from his spot on the living room couch to see Huey picking up his car keys. Once again the revolutionary that was born and raised in Chicago had on another style camouflage attire. They both exchanged looks before Huey sucked his teeth. Hiro and Guadalupe were making some sampling some beats on their laptops in silence. Simply just observing the negative energy that began to surge through the household.

"What you suckin' your teeth at me for?" Caesar asked, placing his notepad down. "Does this have to do with the legal contract I signed you up for?"

"Yes!" Huey yelled, causing Hiro and Guadalupe to jump in freight.

Both DJs had their headphones on with the music on full blast. Somehow though, Huey's amplified voice broke through the sound barrier.

"I'm just trying to help you, Huey."

"You can't help someone you didn't ask for your help."

"But I can tell from the way you act that you needed help. Now if you are going to be ungrateful about it."

Oh my goodness! Please tell me he didn't just say that…" Lupe gasped.

"He did." Hiro gulped. "I think it's time for me and you to exit stage left!"

"OH HELL NO!" Huey shouted, almost sounding like his younger brother in tone. "You forged my name into a document. That's against the law, dipshit! Plus you didn't even ask ME if I wanted to do this. Why the hell would I want to go on blind dates with the six wackiest girls in Woodcrest? I'd rather go on or get on Facebook before going on a date with some of these girls I've been paired with!"

"Well EXCUUUUUUUUSE ME PRINCESS!" Caesar snapped. "I'm sorry that I cared about the well being of my friend. C'mon son, you've been miserable as of late. You're in desperate need of a lady friend and you know it!"

"I already have a female friend and her name is Michael Caesar!" Huey let out a small laugh. "I mean putting a man who could careless about dating on a show ruled by a crazy pimp. That seems like some feminine shit. We are men, Caesar. If you wanted to help me, you should have came to me like a man and asked. Plus, you're the one that should be on this show. Where's Felicia at?"

Caesar's mouth went dry and the world around him became cold. His own best friend just made a meteor of reality crash into his fantasy world. Felicia has been missing in action for a while and she was most likely cheating on Caesar by now.

"You can't teach an old dog new tricks, Ceez." Huey added salt to the wound. "Stop trying to be a philanthropist and worry about yourself. I understand I'm anti-social, I understand I'm considered a lone wolf but don't put me into a situation that's only going to make things worse!"

"I made things worse? If anything, I think your perspective on females have changed. The last two days you can't tell you didn't at least enjoy something about those two girls."

Not wanting to admit defeat, Huey just proceeded to head towards the front door.

"Taking the coward's way out?" Caesar mocked Huey's signature face gesture. "You dog on me because my gurl is M.I.A."

"Don't worry." Huey opened the door without looking back. "We will finish this conversation later. I've got a date with Zuri 'Miss International' Denvers."

The door closed and the confrontation ended temporarily. Caesar just let out a deep sigh and banged his fist against the counter.

**A couple of minutes later…**

For the last two days Huey met his dates in front of The House of Cheeks. This time though, he wanted to try a different approach and actually pick up his date from their house. Now for some reason, that seemed like a bad idea because Zuri lived in one of the worst neighborhoods in not only Woodcrest, but all of Illinois. Huey slowly accelerated down the street as he saw a lot of men that fit the stereotype of black gang members. Their eyes pierced through Huey's car in attempts to scare him. The eldest Freeman brother just returned the look back until one shirtless man then hopped in front of his car with a baseball bat in hand. His upper body was toned and covered with tattoos. Was this supposed to intimidate people? Huey just laughed silently in his mind until he noticed that the man started talking.

"What's up nigga?" the boy smacked the bat into the palm of his hand. "You know where you at?"

"Wuncler Gardens." Huey rolled his eyes. "Now if you don't mind I have somewhere to be."

"Nigga, who the fuck do you think you are? You can't just roll down these means street and NOT get stopped by one of us! As street soliders we protect these streets from fake ass niggas like you!"

"Fake ass nigga?"

"Yup, I use to go to high school with yo fake ass! You use to read dem books and shit! Get straights A's and shit. You know REAL niggas skip class and fuck bitches! Those are two things you've never done, so I advise you turn yo whip around and go back to the white side of town!"

"Well since you aren't any type of law enforcement and I'm going to have to decline your dumb ass request." Huey then revved his engine.

"You think that's suppose to scare me?" the street solider of Wuncler Gardens then brought his bat all the way up into the air. "However I think this will scare you!" he then used all of his strength to bring the bat down and sabotage Huey's windshield with one hit.

Huey then kicked his driver's door open and got into a fighting stance. As soon as he stepped foot onto the old pavement, he became surrounded by gang members.

"You just made a huge mistake, nigga." The bat wielding street solider yelled. "GET THAT NIGGA!"

Huey just grinned as the men that surrounded him began to charge towards him. Always accepting an open challenge, Huey tossed off his shirt and kicked the first man that got close to him. The kick was brutal, as a couple of teeth flew through the afternoon sky. Without even turning around Huey then gave another man a spinning back elbow. Same results, a couple of teeth was knocked from the attacker's mouth. With two moves, Huey already eliminated one-fourth of the gang. The remaining six, excluding the leader just stood back cautiously.

"If it helps, I fight you with one hand behind my back." Huey smiled wickedly. He loved playing mind games with his enemies. "C'mon, this will make it a lot fairer. I mean, it's already bad enough it's six men on one, but now the one guy is going to use his LEFT arm only."

"GO GET DAT BASTARD!" the leader shouted.

The men responded like the tools they were and charged at our hero from five different angles. Huey just smirked as he knew the exact move he could execute to knock them all out at once. With a simple leap, Huey became airborne and he did one of his favorite moves of all-time. However that was easily interrupted thanks to a baseball bat that smacked him back to the ground. The leader laughed as he saw Huey clinching his ribs in pain. He adjusted his red fitted baseball cap and began to stomp on Huey.

"C'mon niggas, let's stomp the yard!" he signaled for his fallen comrades to join in the massacre.

Huey just laid there helplessly as the seven men ambushed him. The leader then stopped stomping and stared at his bat. A sick and twisted smile formed his face as he grabbed his signature weapon and poked Huey in the face with it.

"See this is what happens you think you can just come down my streets like you run the place. No one fucks with Young Rod!"

"Nobody…but…me!" Huey yelled and then jumped back onto his feet and punched Young Rod in the jaw.

The force caused the fallen leader to slam into another parked car. Meanwhile the six remaining members saw the fire burning in Huey's eyes and they all retreated in six different directions. Young Rod slowly got back up to his feet as he spat some blood from his mouth. His jaw felt kind of loose, but he didn't let that bother him as he got into his fighting stance.

"Ha! That was some lucky ass cheap shot!"

"A cheap shot?" Huey dropped his stance and placed his hands on his hips. "Nigga, you just hit me with a bat and stomped me and you call my legit right hook a cheap shot?"

Young Rod's response was him charged towards Huey. The revolutionary shook his head as he got back into his stance and began to play defense. Rod threw a left jab that was blocked by Huey's right forearm. After the first failed attack, Rod then decided it would be a better idea to attack with more speed and less power. He then became to throw a barrage of quick right jabs mixed in with a couple of left jabs. Huey yawned as he blocked them all with relative ease.

'_Should I just knock his dumb ass out now?'_

"HUEY!" a young feminine voice echoed down the street. Huey looked at where the voice came from, which caused him to drop his guard.

Young Rod saw his golden gate of opportunity opening as Huey's attention was focused on the whereabouts of the voice. Rod then delivered a strong uppercut into Huey's stomach, causing the revolutionary to wheeze. The blow caused Huey to easily fall to his knees and try to catch his breath. Rod just laughed and wrapped his large hand around Huey's neck.

"You ain't shit!" Rod exclaimed as he held Huey suspended in the air.

"GET YO NASTY ASS HANDS OFF MAH MAN!" the mystery voice became present again.

Then all of the sudden Rod's eyes became bug eyed as he dropped Huey and grabbed his groin and began to yell in the most utmost pain. Meanwhile the revolutionary managed to barely land on his feet as he looked to see what in the world just happened.

"Hey Huey!" the figure smirked doing a sexy pose. "Miss International is definitely in the building! Well actually we are outside, but you get my point."

Zuri was responsible for Huey not being choked to death. While Young Rod had Huey in the chokehold, Zuri snuck up behind the shirtless thug and kicked in the nuts. Plain and simple.

"You don't you could have made your grand entrance like ten minutes earlier?" Huey held onto his ribs. "You know before these niggas stomped me into the pavement."

"I'm sorry, I was touchin' up my make-up." she battered her eyelashes. "So how do I look?"

Huey examined his date as he noticed that she was actually looking really nice for someone who lives in this part of town. She had on a black tunic dress with a wide red leather belt that wrapped around her slender waist. To make this outfit complete, she had on matching red knee high boots. After Huey looked at the boots he glimpsed back up and noticed she was bending over in front of him. This gave him an excellent view of her cleavage, which was extremely noticeable.

"Oh and check out the back side!" she then slowly turned around.

The back of Zuri's belt read 'Miss Int'l' a nickname which was given to her because she has had sexual relations with every nationality known to man.

"You look nice." Huey told her. "However I think we should get going, the carnival doesn't stay open to late on the weekdays."

Zuri's face lit up like a little child's on Christmas morning. She instantly latched onto Huey's neck and placed kisses all over his face.

"I haven't been to the carnival in ages. The last time I went I lost my virginity." Zuri awed.

Huey just arched his eyebrow at her comment and walked her over to his windshield less car. Zuri noticed the missing windshield and stuck her nose up in disapproval.

"There's no damn way I'm ridin' in that!"

"Big talk from someone who doesn't have a car." Huey muttered under his breath.

"Huey, let's walk there." she tugged him out of the driver's seat. "Look! I can see the Ferris wheel from here."

"Sure, why the hell not?" Huey sighed. "I just got brutally assaulted, but I don't mind walking fifteen blocks to the carnival grounds.

"Oh goodie!" she clapped her hands.

**A couple of minutes later…**

The couple made it to the carnival grounds and they began to walk around looking for fun filled activities to get involved in. To the left of them, there was a shooting gallery and to the right of them was a cotton candy booth.

"I've got a sweet tooth right now." Zuri whined. "Can you buy me some cotton candy?"

"Zuri, do you know that there's usually between one hundred calories to one hundred fifteen calories in one ounce of cotton candy?" Huey asked her. Zuri just made stuck her bottom lip out and pointed at the booth again. "Okay, I'll get you damn cotton candy, shoot! If you want to knock some years off your life with all that sugar in take you go right ahead."

Zuri skipped merrily over to the booth, which amazed Huey because she did have those heels on her boots. Once he made it to the booth, the owner of the booth yawned and gave the couple a weak smile. Apparently this man was bored out of his mind but now some excitement was about to come to him.

"Hello kids!" the old man smiled. "What can I get you two?"

Huey just looked at the man like he was the stupidest human being on Earth. They were at a cotton candy booth, what the hell could they want besides cotton candy?

"I'd like to overthrow the government and start a revolution to create a new free world. Do you have any of that?" Huey smirked.

"That's funny little man." the old man adjusted his frames. "Because I used to want to start a revolution too and now I work at a cotton candy booth at a carnival."

"You're kidding right?" Huey asked, becoming interested in this old man.

"I kid you not. Have you ever heard of the Woodcrest Riot of 95?" Huey shook his head, which caused the old man to grin. "Well lemme tell what went down on that day. I was at the civic center with my fellow revolutionaries and we just made a speech about all the corruption in the government. Now we practically had all of Woodcrest on our side. But then I made a fatal mistake."

"What did you do?" Zuri rolled her eyes. She didn't give a damn about this man's past. Miss Int'l just wanted some cotton candy!

"I'm glad you asked, little lady." he smiled. "I told the crowd that Jesus was black, Ronald Reagan was the devil and the government is lying about the World Trade Center bombings in 93. After that, all hell broke loose. They had to call in the S.W.A.T. team all the way from Chicago to help our local team. Unfortunately I lost all of my followers that day. I was arrested and after spending one night in that jail cell, I then knew that I had to change my lifestyle."

"So lemme get this straight." Huey stuck his hands into his pocket and stared down at the dirt below him. "You had nearly all of Woodcrest eating the knowledge out of the palm of your hand and just because you said that last statement, they turned on you and you got locked up."

The old man nodded his head slowly.

"Okay and after spending a night in jail, you came out the next day wanted work at the carnival as the cotton candy vendor?" Huey then grabbed Zuri's hand. "Alright, we'll just see you later!"

The old man just gave them a lazy smile as they scrolled away. Huey just kept a grip around Zuri's wrist as he navigated them through the crowd. Zuri was too occupied with her cotton candy to even notice they were passing by one of her favorite attractions. Right as they were passing it, the bright lights caught her eye and she dropped the cotton candy from the excitement.

"We've gotta do that!" Zuri then pointed to the dunking booth.

Huey looked at the booth and noticed there wasn't a line. He also came to a conclusion that Zuri probably has horrible aim and wouldn't be able to hit the bullseye. Eventually after failing on numerous attempts, she'd get bored and possibly might want to go home.

"Okay." Huey grinned, hoping his theory would work. "Let's get it a shot."

Before they reached the booth, they noticed a sign above the small building that read: 3 balls for $5.00, 5 balls for $7.00, and 10 balls for $12.00. This was one of the many reasons Huey never went to the carnival. His pockets were becoming lighter by every step they took through the festival.

"One ball is all I would need." Huey whispered to himself.

"I'd prefer two balls." Zuri stated in a matter-of-fact tone. "But beggers can't be choosers, right?"

'What did I get myself into?' Huey fell his shoulders get heavy.

The dunking booth was extremely dry which symbolized that either no one has been success in dipping the babe or no one has tried. Huey crossed his arms across his chest as he examined the woman sitting on the bench of the small pool.

"Is that Huey Freeman?" the young lady shouted from the booth. When she saw him nodded his head, she nearly shrieked in joy. "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN YEAAAAAAAAAAARS!"

"Hey Cristal." Huey waved shyly. "What are you doing here?"

The cappuccino skin toned beauty just grinned and battered her eyelashes. Strong jolts of jealousy began to disperse from Zuri's body. Cristal's beauty just seems to emulate golden rays of loveliness. It caused Zuri's beauty to go into a temporary eclipse. Huey noticed the angry look on his date's face and quickly waved his hands in front of Cristal.

"It's not even like that." Huey said quickly in a panic. "This is an old acquaintance of mine. I met her ago nearly thirteen years ago. Plus, she's way out of my league…"

"That's beside the point. I can't let no bitch flaunt her goodies in front of my man! Doesn't she know who I am?" Zuri bellowed.

"Actually I have no clue who you are." Cristal pointed out. "People with manners introduce themselves."

"You want an intro?" Zuri flicked her curly ponytail and rolled her eyes. "You don't deserve one."

"What crawl and died up your ass today?" Cristal snapped back.

"Hold me back, Huey!" Zuri popped both her earrings off and toss them to the side. "I'm gonna…"

Zuri then slammed three dollars on the counter. Cristal just chuckled lightly as her assistant handed Miss International three baseballs. Huey arched his eyebrow and he observed the conflict going on between the two women.

"Soak your ass and show you what's up! I hope you got some dry clothes, ho!" Zuri tossed the ball into the air and caught it.

"Ha, you probably can't even hit the-" Cristal then let out a quick shriek as she felt the bench below her drop. The former employee of A Pimp Named Slickback fell into the pool with a splash. She swam over to the rim and extended her wet hand out to Zuri.

"You did good…" Cristal admitted. "Well since you're not going to tell me your name, I 'm Cristal."

"Like the champagne?" Zuri asked, staring at the extended hand.

"Yup, so now are you going to tell me your name?"

"I suppose I owe you that." Zuri grinned. "You know after I put dat ass down into the water! But my name is Zuri 'Miss International' Denvers."

"Miss International? You children are coming up with the silliest aliases these days." Cristal wiped her face with a towel. "Can I ask why you have such an interesting nickname?"

Zuri then bent over and whispered something in Cristal's ear. The older woman blushed and then covered her mouth and looked at Huey who was looking away.

"That's not good at all, honey." Cristal then hopped out of the pool. "You've gotta change that lifestyle up, pronto!"

"Why though? I mean I love screwing various men and I love the attention I get from others. I love the girls that envy me, I love the guys that lust me."

"But how far is that going to get you in life? You know once upon a time ago I was just like you. A ho. I worked from A Pimp Named Slickback and it wasn't until then I releazied that I had so much going for my life. There are better things I can do in my life than be another man's object of desire."

"You don't think I know that!" Zuri turned her back. "My cousin exposed me to older men at an early age. He basically prostituted me and I found out but yet I still enjoyed it! So what does leave me to believe in? If the people that are suppose to love me can't have make positive choices, then neither can I!"

"With that attitude, you'll be the way you are forever. Usually when people want to switch up their lifestyle to better accommodate others. Sometimes it's because of a person. Back when I was around your age, I was a top notch ho. Deep down, I wanted to go to school but I had no confidence in that, so instead I did something that made me feel good. It wasn't until I met your little friend's grandfather that I realized that I am who I make myself to be. A Pimp Named Slickback made me a ho, but I can make myself what I want."

"So now you work at a carnival?" Zuri still was talking with her back turned. "This is what you wanted to be."

"No, I'm here because this all the funds I receive from this booth will go towards a charity I'm helping. I go to nursing school now."

Zuri turned around with a shocked look. How could this voluptuous woman be going to school to become a certified nurse? A decade ago she was doing the same devious acts! The wheel of fate has rotated a new revolution for Cristal.

"So it's possible to overcome an addiction, even without the help of loved ones?" Zuri croaked.

Cristal then placed her arm around Zuri's shoulder and gave her a sly grin. Zuri just stared at the soaked beauty and wondered who gave her permission to get all touchy touchy with her.

"I don't have any STDs or anything." Cristal told Zuri. "So you ain't gotta look at me like I'm infected. But on a serious note, I can see you like Huey. Correct?"

A light blush crept across Zuri's face as she bashfully nodded her head. She then looked out the corner of her eye to see if Huey was watching. The wandering revolutionary was staring off in a total direction from the two ladies.

"Well, you can't expect to have a man like him if you're continue to carry yourself like a ho." the sentence came out of Cristal's mouth like she was never in the same situation. "Time for a change. But remember if you are going to seriously change, then do it for yourself. Not just Huey."

"I suppose."

"You don't sound like you wanna do this. No one is putting a gun to your head but just know Huey will not tolerate a girl that can't respect herself."

The words sank into Zuri's brain like the Titanic. Sacrifices have to be made. Addictions must end and a new lifestyle must unfold. As all these thoughts fluttered through Miss International's mind, Huey finally glanced at the two ladies and wondering what they could possible be talking about.

"Well here he comes, just keep the things I said in mind and good luck." Cristal winked.

"Hey Huey, let's do something we can both do together." Zuri said in a sweet tone.

This newfound tone caused Huey to arch his eyebrow. It wasn't that normal lust-filled, seductive tone that suited Zuri's lifestyle. This tone seemed more soothing. The sound caused Huey's heart to skip a beat. Cristal noticed the changes in Huey's face and grinned at Zuri.

"W-what did you have in mind?" Huey stuttered.

Zuri gave him a soft smile and motioned to a huge red building with twelve letters that made Huey's palms become extremely sweaty.

"Let's go in the tunnel of love." Zuri then dragged Huey towards the attraction.

"You kids have fun!" Cristal sang in a motherly tone. She waved the two youngsters farewell as she continued to dry herself off.

**A couple of minutes later…**

Soft romantic music clashed with the splashes of the water flowing from the man made river created the perfect scene for two star-crossed lovers. This is the mentality that Zuri had meanwhile the young man sitting next to her couldn't exactly relate. Huey was really concerned about the change of Zuri's persona since the talk she had with Cristal.

'Is she acting this way because Cristal told her to change?' Huey was snapped about his thoughts as he felt Zuri's head touch his shoulder.

"So Huey, tell me how life was in Chicago." Zuri cooed.

"Well, it was definitely a lot more hectic than it is here." Huey chuckled. "Lots more crime, lots more poverty and a hell of a lot more niggas."

"Anything possible about the Chi then?"

Huey then bit his lip to stop himself from revealing his past to this young lady. Even though he had a couple of classes with Zuri in high school, they were no more than acquaintances. The relationship they currently have isn't strong enough from him to reveal his past. Zuri looked up from her comfortable spot to see a glint in Huey's eyes.

"I'm sorry." she whispered. In the past Zuri did hear some rumors about how Huey and Riley's parents were killed in a car accident. "Just forget I even asked."

Huey didn't respond. The next couple of minutes were silent as the dove continued to navigate to the end of the tunnel. Zuri was mentally cursing at herself in the end. This new sweet girl approach wasn't worrying as well as she thought it would. Ever since her tactics have changed, it seems the changes of bagging Huey is getting slimmer!

'Okay, that's it! If he doesn't like my plan of action then I'm through wit him!' Zuri thought she licked her lips.

Zuri then got out of her position on Huey's shoulder and relocated onto his lap. Huey's eyes bulged out their sockets as he felt the huge posterior fall into his lap. She then grinned at his silly facial expression as she wrapped her arms around his neck.

"Huey, have you ever kissed a girl before?"

He slowly gulped. "No."

"Good, because now you can kiss a woman."

Zuri puckered her lips together and slowly starting approached Huey. The closer their lips got, the harder Huey's heartbeat. Just as their lips were about to meet, the lights in the tunnel began to flicker. This disturbance didn't bother Zuri as now her lips were less than a centimeter from brushing against Huey's.

"Payback, motherfucka!" a voice echoed through the tunnel.

Suddenly the sound of multiple firearms overpowered the music and waves and the flickering lights were accompanied by flashing from bullets escaped their chambers.

"Zuri, get down!" Huey grabbed Zuri and got down on top of her.

The white swan was starting to look like a dice as the bullets whizzed through and created multiple holes. However, somehow these bullets were totally missing Huey and Zuri.

"Hold yer fire!" the voice yelled. The other five guns ceased their fire. "I think we sent our message, haha!"

The boat began to sink into the water. Young Rod and his five goons then put away their firearms and walked out the tunnel like nothing even happened. Meanwhile underneath the water, Huey and Zuri were still holding each other, hopefully that the thugs had truly left and wasn't waiting for them inside the tunnel. Huey slowly poked his head through the surface and saw that the coast was clear. He then grabbed Zuri's hand and helped up onto the platform which would lead to the exit.

"Are you okay?" Huey asked while placing a secure arm around Zuri.

"Oh yeah I'm fine." Zuri giggled. "I'm use to those niggas shootin' in my projects."

"MAY I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE? THE WOODCREST CARNIVAL WILL BE CLOSING DOWN DUE TO THE HIGH PROBABILITY OF AN ESCAPED FELON RUNNING AROUND THE FAIRGROUNDS. I REPEAT THE CARNIVAL IS CLOSED AND IF ANYONE IS ON THE FAIRGROUNDS AFTER THE NEXT FIVE MINUTES WILL BE ARRESTED ON THE SPOT!"

"Well looks like our night got cut short." Huey said.

"Yep." Zuri replied in a sad tone.

Deep down, Huey kind of wanted that kiss from Zuri. But Huey also wants a woman that can respect him and herself. Change takes more than fifteen minutes. Most importantly, Huey doesn't want Zuri to change for him, but he wants her to change for herself.

"Hey excuse me, sir." a man dressed in Woodcrest Police Department ran up to the couple panting. "Have you guys seen a latina running around with a pink Desert Eagle?"

"Nope." they both replied in unison.

"Okay, well you two make sure you leave the premise soon. We are about to lock this place down and find her. She escaped from holding about three hours ago."

"Alright, sir." Huey gave the officer a fake smile. "Good luck finding her…you're gonna need it."

**Meanwhile at the Woodcrest YMCA…**

A lone figure stood inside of the gym all alone. With a hood around their head they held two pieces of wood. The figure tossed both boards into the air at the same time. One swift kick destroyed the first board with relative ease. The second board was snapped into half from the velocity of the first board being shattered.

"Okay, lemme try it with my eyes closed this time." the figure threw off their hood.

This mysterious figure had a goddess like physique, which revealed it was a girl. She took a deep breath and threw two new pieces of wood into the air. Once the wood got to its peak position, the woman closed her eyes.

"Alright, I can sense the aura of…" she then threw a jab at the first board and successful took it out. "And for this other one…"

She turned her head to left and saw the aura of the second board. She then jumped up and delivered a punctual back kick, successful snapping the board into pieces as well. Feeling satisfied, she opened her eyes and saw the mess she created.

"Victory will be mine." she told her reflection.

* * *

A/N: Another date sabotaged! Seems to be a pattern. Will Huey ever go on a normal date? Only time and my imagination will tell! Plz review this story and have a HAPPY NEW YEAR!

**~TM-1**


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